Page 71 of Revere: A Legacy Novel

“I’m sorry I yelled at you that day you came to the college,” Catherine murmured.

Cross’s fingers sifted through her hair. “It’s all right.”

“It’s really not.”

“You feel the way you feel, and for good reason. You were right, anyway. I did what you said. I left when I said I would be there.”

“Yes, but—”

“Reasons are excuses, Catherine. I made a choice because of a circumstance, but the choice was still made at the end of the day.”

A choice that hurt her.

Catherine heard what he left unsaid loud and clear. It was what she wished her father would understand, too. He had made a choice, and it hurt her. It was not as simple as getting an explanation, an apology, and then she would be okay.

Not at all.

“I was so fragile,” Catherine said, watching the first drops of rain fall after another boom of thunder. “Back then, I mean. I worked for months to be clean, okay mentally, and strong physically. I worked hard. All it took was one single day—you being gone—and I was reminded that I was still nothing more than a china doll.”

“What did that make you feel like?”

“Fragile. Breakable. Pretty on a shelf. Painted on smile. Dusty …”

“And?”

“Forgotten,” Catherine whispered.

Cross’s arm tightened around her waist, while his hand stilled in her hair. She felt his lips press to the back of her neck as he said, “You are none of those things, Catty.”

“I was,” she countered. “Even when I was good, I had to learn I was still fragile. Now I’m not, though, because I learned to put myself back together. I fell hard, and for once, no one was there to catch me. No one patched me up. I did it alone. I don’t ever want to go back to being that fragile doll again. I won’t let anyone make me feel like that again.”

Cross rested his chin on her shoulder. “You shouldn’t.”

“Except I feel like I might be her again with you. Or I’m scared that’s how it’ll be. Do you know what I mean?”

“You know I won’t do that to you, right?”

“Consider it like … a warning.”

Cross smile grew against her skin. “Oh?”

“I don’t mean to be difficult, but I’m always fighting the idea that someone might think I’m going to break apart. Or worse, if someone makes me feel that way. I just might make this hard sometimes while I’m still trying to figure it all out.”

“Okay,” he said.

“Okay?”

“Okay, Catty.”

“And also, I don’t know what I’m doing. Or what I want to do about you, us, and the rest. So, there’s that.”

Cross’s breath puffed against her skin with his chuckle. “But it’s easy, right?”

“We were always easy, Cross.”

Like breathing.

That kind of scared her, too.