Page 75 of Revere: A Legacy Novel

“Not yet.”

“I don’t like your fighting with Calisto,” she said quietly. “You never fight with him, Cross. Not now. It makes me sad. And he is your father, but wasn’t he always, anyway? Didn’t he always love you, regardless of the rest? These are details, Cross.”

Details weren’t supposed to matter.

Even he said it.

“Details someone forgot to mention to me,” he pointed out gently.

“You know,” Emma said, looking down at her twisting hands, “I named you for Calisto.”

“What?”

“Your name—Cross. Calisto had a bad accident; we’ve talked about it and the head trauma it caused.”

“Yeah, sure.”

“We’ve never talked about what really happened to him, though. He had amnesia for a long while,” Emma admitted. “Long enough that you were a newborn before he regained his memories. He didn’t remember me, or us, and he didn’t even know about you before. I never got the chance to tell him I was pregnant with you before his accident happened, you see. It was only after he remembered that he put dates and other things together, and figured it out.”

Cross glanced away. “What does this have to do with my name, Ma?”

“I’m getting there. Calisto gave me a rosary with a cross on it once to help me. He thought it might help me get over a difficult time in my life—when I lost my second child. After his accident, I gave him one that was similar, thinking it may help him remember. He was always touching it, and having it nearby. So when it came time to pick your name, I chose Cross. The Cross. My Cross. And his Cross.”

“To give him another clue,” Cross assumed.

“And because it held meaning for me.” Emma gave him a small smile and sighed. “I know maybe we were wrong not to tell you, but he’s always been your dad, Cross. Just like I’m your mother. How can you be angry when the only thing we did was love you?”

“I’m not angry, Ma. I’m … fuck. For my whole life, every man in this family had to remind me that I came from a man who betrayed us. You, me, Calisto, and famiglia. They said it again and again, like he was a stain I had to wear, and so I did. I worked twice as hard. I proved my worth over and over, just so that even one of them would stop using Affonso’s name alongside mine. Yet, even now, there are men in other families who refer to the Donati principe as “Affonso’s son” and not actually the man who raised me.”

“Oh, Cross.”

“So maybe you can understand why I need some time to settle things. I don’t want to come into that conversation still bitter because I don’t want to hurt him or you. Can’t you understand?”

“I can,” she said softly.

“I will get it settled, Ma, eventually. One thing at a time, okay?”

“What else do you have on your mind?”

Maybe … if he gave his mother something else to focus on where he was concerned, she would leave the whole paternity thing alone for a bit.

“Catherine,” he murmured.

Emma’s gaze lit up. “The Catherine?”

“There’s only ever been one in my life, right?”

“How long? Why didn’t you tell me?” His mother grabbed his face and stood up on her tiptoes to look him right in the eyes. “This is good. This is good, right?”

Cross laughed. “Yeah, Ma, it’s good.”

“You didn’t answer anything else, Cross.”

“She’s figuring shit out, that’s all. There’s not much to tell.”

Emma’s smile faded. “It has been a long time, I suppose.”

“Still feels like yesterday,” he said out of the corner of his mouth.