Page 150 of Duty

It was too much.

“He came the other day,” Valeria said out of the blue.

Haven stiffened, and held a little tighter to the cordless phone. “Did he?”

“Showed up early in the morning asking for you.”

“Did you tell him—”

“Not where you went, or anything,” her friend was quick to say.

“Thanks.”

“No problem, but …”

Yeah, another but.

Surprise, surprise.

“What?” Haven asked.

“He did look really taken off guard by the fact you were gone, and then kind of … sad.”

Haven glanced out the window again—the rain had picked up, it seemed. Appropriate, considering her heart was heavier than ever, and her soul felt just as gray as the sky above. Love shouldn’t make a person feel like this; of that, she was most sure.

Yet, she still did.

Love him, that was.

“I needed time,” Haven murmured. “I couldn’t just call him when I knew the first thing he would do was cloud up my thoughts and feelings.”

Because hearts were traitorous like that.

They needed love to live.

Haven needed for love to not feel like a game, or worse, an afterthought to someone else. She couldn’t have her love be something that Andino could do with, or without, depending on the day or his mood. She needed it to be more to him.

Something worth having, and keeping.

She didn’t know if it was.

She didn’t even know if he loved her back.

“Yeah, I know,” Valeria eventually replied. “Well, Maria is just waking up. Call me when your flight lands today?”

“I will.”

She’d been here long enough.

It was time to go home.

Haven still didn’t know how she felt about that, either.

Yeah, she really was a mess.

Or a coward, her mind taunted.

That, too.