Page 166 of Cara & Gian: The Guzzi Duet

“He’s married.”

“Yes.”

“He was involved with me in a relationship.”

“Again, yes,” Frankie said.

“Then that is an affair,” Cara pointed out.

Frankie still didn’t look entirely bothered by Cara’s reasoning. “I mean, technically, sure. But only because men who join our … thing, aren’t allowed to be divorced, for the most part. Some do, sure, but they know they’re never going fucking anywhere. Gian, being an underboss at the time, couldn’t afford something like a divorce, given the circumstances of his marriage.”

“Circumstances like?” Cara pressed.

“That’s something he’d have to answer. I just know arrangements aren’t usually made to be broken.”

“He was still having an affair with me. He made me his mistress and he didn’t even have the decency to tell me.”

“Because he didn’t have paper stamped from a proper divorce,” Frankie replied softly. “After how many years of being separated from his wife, is he allowed to have a relationship with someone else? Even though they were clearly separated, why do words like affair have to be tossed into it? Why does the fact he’s married—but again, separated—have to be the first thing to be brought up in conversation? Seems unfair to him.”

“That’s easy for you to say, to defend his actions, sure. But people still consider her to be his wife. They are still married.” Cara glanced away. “Does it seem unfair because you, too, were miserable in your relationship with your wife, and occasionally found a happy pause with my sister?”

Frankie blew out a slow breath. “A happy pause?”

“You’re still with your wife, aren’t you?”

“Yes. We have one child, a girl. Our first boy is on the way, due in a month. We’re very much together. Happily, I might add.”

“Happily. Even after what you did?”

“My wife and I were a lot like Lea and I were, before the pregnancy thing got in the way. Casual, no strings, and we didn’t get too deep with one another on an emotional level. And then the pregnancy came, so our family forced us to do the right thing.” Frankie’s tone twisted bitterly, and his lips curved into a sneer. “We didn’t want to be married. She didn’t want me around, and I didn’t want to be there, either. You think she didn’t know? She knew, but she didn’t care. She didn’t consider us together, even if everybody else did because we weren’t divorced.”

“Oh,” Cara murmured.

“Our unhappiness meant nothing to everyone else, as long as we continued doing the right thing for who we are,” Frankie continued with a heavy sigh.

“And so, Lea …”

“Was there,” he said, “and it was stupid and easy, but it hurt us both a lot, too.”

“And what about your wife?”

“Our daughter was born, and I was over there a lot more. I stayed with her, to help with the baby and whatever else. You could say the baby brought us closer, as silly as that might sound. It’d been a while since I had seen Lea at all when she died,” Frankie admitted, frowning. “There was no proper breakup or goodbye, whatever. It was hard, and it set me back for a while with my wife because I felt like I couldn’t explain what was happening inside my head. Circumstances being what they were, and all.”

“But did you?”

“Eventually.” Frankie chuckled. “She’s pretty amazing, my wife.”

“Did you love my sister?” Cara dared to ask.

“Not in the right way,” Frankie said without even thinking about it. “Not in a way she should have been, not like I do with my wife now. It took a while to figure that out, too.”

“In an unhealthy way?”

“Exactly.”

Cara tapped her fingernails to the table, settled in her heart, yet restless in her soul. “Thanks for meeting up with me to talk about this. I know it’s private, and you really didn’t need to tell me anything, if you didn’t want to.”

“I don’t think this was only for you to talk and learn about Lea.”