Page 150 of John + Siena: The Complete Duet

EIGHTEEN

John shoved his legs into his pants. “You’re sure I got here around twelve last night?”

Siena crawled out of the bed. “Yeah, around then.”

She kept the sheet clutched to her chest. It wasn’t like she was trying to hide her body from him, or anything. Most of the night before had been spent with them in bed together. He arrived at her place looking like he was out of his mind, and without a thing to say.

He didn’t want to talk. He only wanted to fuck.

Siena hadn’t been able to turn him away. As much as it killed her to see John like that, and to let him use her like that, she let him in. She had already let him into her heart, her bed, and into her life.

What difference would last night make?

None at all.

Fact was, Siena was selfish. She wanted John. She didn’t care about the rest—those were details that they could handle at another time. She needed him close, and she wanted him with her. No matter his frame of mind, she just wanted him.

So, when he showed up at her door, she didn’t ask questions. She didn’t press him for information, or ask him where he had been. She didn’t demand to know why he hadn’t answered her phone calls or reply to any of her texts. He was there, and that was all that mattered.

“Did I smell like smoke?” he asked.

Siena frowned. “Smoke?”

“That’s what I said!”

Siena straighten on the spot, and clutched the sheet tighter in her fist. “You don’t need to yell at me, John.”

“I didn’t yell.”

“You don’t even hear yourself right now, do you?”

John hesitated when he grabbed his shirt. Instead of putting it on, he stared over at her. The two of them stood like that, staring at each other for a long while before one of them finally spoke and broke the silence.

“Have you seen your therapist?” Siena asked.

John’s throat bobbed with a swallow. “Monday, maybe. Or Tuesday.”

“You’re not sure?”

“One of those days.”

Siena nodded once. “When you did actually see her, have you told her that you haven’t been taking your meds?”

John tensed all over. In a blink, Siena could see how his entire demeanor changed at her simple question. She doubted anyone had outright asked him that lately, if at all. Had he even been around anyone who would dare to ask him that question?

“Have you told her?”

“I’ve been taking my meds,” John said.

“Have you?” Siena asked. “I’ve seen your meds, John. I counted the pills. They don’t add up to the prescription and fill date.”

His jaw hardened as his lips pulled back into a sneer. He turned on her with that look, and she knew something nasty was about to leave his mouth. A defense mechanism, maybe. Or it could have even been his mania still manifesting in a verbal form.

Siena really didn’t know.

She couldn’t let this go.

“Before you speak,” she told him, “think very carefully about what you want to say to me. Consider if I am asking these things to hurt you, or because I care, John.”