Page 259 of John + Siena: The Complete Duet

“What?” John asked, irritated.

“Choose stability.”

“I am.”

“How structured have your days been since you left the facility, John?”

Well, that one, he had to stop and think about. It was not an easy answer because at the moment, his entire life just felt like one giant ball of chaos. One thing after another thing, after another thing. It never ended.

“I’m structured in the areas that need to be handled,” John chose to say.

“Your bipolar. Managing it, you mean.”

John nodded. “That’s what’s important, right?”

“Take that away, though, John. Remove your twice weekly appointments, your strict regimes for diet and exercise, and the other routines you have in place to manage your disorder. Is that the only thing keeping you on track right now?”

“Somedays, it’s the only thing keeping me sane at the moment, yeah.”

“You’re playing a dangerous game with that.”

“Not sure how to correct it right now, either.”

Leonard tapped his watch with one finger, but never took his gaze away from John. “You allow me to do that for you. Sometimes, a break is good for you. I’m the one who—regardless of what is happening in your life—makes you take a moment to step back, objectify things around you, and relax.”

“I don’t find our sessions very relaxing.”

Hard.

Sometimes irritating.

Often, invasive.

Leonard smirked. “Then explain to me why you’ve just spent the last fifteen minutes in a far calmer, less jittery place than you were when you walked in.”

Shit.

“Well …”

“It’s fine to say that this is your safe place, John. We all have one, you know? Mine tends to be high in the sky, amongst the clouds.”

“You’re not my only safe place,” John said. “I have others.”

“Who?”

“My cousin, for one.”

“Andino.”

John’s lip curled back at Andino’s name. Clearly, he was still sore over their fight a few days before. Leonard didn’t miss it.

“Is there trouble with your cousin?”

“I think he’s causing problems to further his own agenda, and I’m not very fond of the way he’s going about it.”

“And so, you’re too irritated with him to let your emotional guard down.”

“You make me sound pathetic.”