Page 47 of Essence of Fear

“Testing.”

Oh, was that what it was?

He didn’t test her much longer. One of his calloused fingers drifted between her folds, and already, she could hear the way her wetness answered his touch. She couldn’t remember the last time her pussy got wet for a man. And yet here she was, already soaked and ready to ruin the sheets on her bed.

It felt like every single one of her inner muscles decided to clamp down around his finger when he slipped it inside her pussy. A visceral reaction of her body—the natural instinct of fear that something was happening that had hurt time and time again before.

But this time it didn’t.

This time, it felt fucking wonderful.

Her pussy stayed tight as he added a second finger, and his thumb came up to rub against her clit at the second time. But now, it was tight because more. She wanted more.

Pav cupped the side of her throat with his other hand, and she tipped her head into the touch, lost in the sensations between her thighs that felt like they were crawling through her whole body. At the same time, she watched him.

That darkness in his eyes.

That grin.

How he watched her.

She was hyperaware of the feeling of his cock pressing against the thin cotton of his boxer-briefs as she pushed against his body. That cock of his—thick and hard—rested against her stomach, and she let her fingers drift over the ridges of his length just because she wanted to touch him somehow.

He didn’t seem to mind.

Pav went on her cues. The louder her sounds became, the more he touched her in the same way. The harder her hips rocked into his hand, the deeper his fingers went inside her pussy. She realized then that when he talked about cues, it wasn’t just the bad ones. He watched for the good cues, too, and because of that, knew exactly how to play her body until she was shaking and gasping for breath.

How long had it been since she’d orgasmed?

Too long.

Viktoria almost forgot how an orgasm felt until there it was, crashing over her body like a wave she couldn’t possibly escape from. It was intense, and she almost couldn’t take it. She almost lost her balance standing there, his name falling from her lips like a prayer. She’d worried that orgasm might taste like fear, or maybe … it would hurt somehow.

It did none of those things.

Instead, it reminded her that intimacy was in fact good when it was right. It reminded her that she was absolutely a woman with a body that craved pleasure and affection. It reminded her that she was human, and sometimes, humans just needed to be touched.

“Oh, my God,” she mumbled into his palm.

Soft chuckles colored up the room as she felt his hand slip from between her thighs. “What do you want now, hmm?”

Her eyes flew open to find him still staring at her. Her answer came easily—too easy. “More. I want more.”

“I need—”

“I have condoms in my bedside drawer.”

A brand-new box. Bought months ago. Just in case, although at the time, she figured there was no chance in hell that she would ever use them.

Life was laughing at her now.

Or cheering her on.

Pav left her side, then, heading for the bedside stand, and she felt the loss of him in a way she hadn’t expected. A coolness washed over her body, threatening to take away the high she’d been riding, but Viktoria refused to let it take over. By the time he came back to her, she was already sitting on the edge of the bed and looking up at him.

She didn’t mind that he loomed.

Not now.