Page 251 of The Monster and the Masochist

“Get your tongue out of her mouth! What the fuck is wrong with you!”

“Cal, wait! Let me explain–” Naomi’s voice floated down the hall as the entire house suddenly fell silent.

I glanced at Logan and Dakota, my eyes so wide they felt like they were going to pop out of my head.

“Oh shit,” I muttered.

Dakota’s hand had flown up to cover his mouth, and Logan’s eyes were just as wide as mine were.

“Oh shit is right…”

Ronan bounded into the room, a soda in hand and a wild smile on his face.

“Did you guys hear that?!” he chirped, and we all nodded at him dumbly, still stricken with shock at what we’d heard.

Ronan’s eyes were alight with an evil sort of mischief, and he took a swig of his soda, chuckling softly.

“This wedding just got a hell of a lot more interesting.” He grinned, and I scrubbed a hand down my face anxiously.

“Wait here. I’ll go see if I can diffuse whatever the fuck is going on in there,” I grumbled before setting off to hopefully stop Callum from murdering his best man minutes before he was supposed to say his vows.

Oh boy. I have a lot to say about this one, and there’s a big chance I might overshare so please proceed with caution haha.

These notes are going to be a little long, but it’s all important stuff I swear.

First, I want to talk about Nolan, because I know his character is going to be pretty polarizing.

For example, I know his use of the ‘d’ word at the beginning of the book in reference to Theo, might be an unforgivable offense for many of us, and normally, I would agree.

Any sort of homophobic bullshit in real life is usually a one-way ticket to no-contact land with me.

BUT, what I wanted to demonstrate with Nolan, is just how ignorant some people *cough* cishet people *cough* are when it comes to these things.

And no, ignorance is not an excuse, and that’s exactly what I was trying to get across with this character.

Nolan fucked up.

What he said was not okay.

He actually said many things that are not okay.

But, the way Nolan responded to Cassandra telling him those things were not okay is what matters, at least for me.

Yes, Nolan is ignorant, and on some level, that’s not necessarily his fault. He was raised by his father who is a corporate attorney with questionable morals, so I think it’s safe to assume his house wasn’t painted in rainbows growing up.

Most of the media that is fed to Nolan probably leans right, which tends to be the case with most social media apps once they label you as a straight white cis gendered man.

Nolan was not exposed to the queer spaces you and I spend most of our time in.

The fact that he had no idea at first why Cassandra was so pissed with him is very telling. Yes, he knows the word is not a nice word, but he has zero clue just how disrespectful he was being when he said it, because there is not a slur in existence that could be used against a cishet man that is comparable.

He just thinks it’s like calling someone an asshole.

What matters here, though, is that instead of brushing off Cassandra’s reaction, gaslighting her, or doing whatever else we have all come to expect from men like this in these situations, Nolan started doing research.

He accepted responsibility for his mistake and not only did he apologize, but he took the initiative to try to learn why what he said was wrong.

He didn’t ask Cassandra to do that work for him.