Page 29 of The Monster and the Masochist

Samantha was my friend. If they were going to take her out, I wanted her returned to me in the same, if not better, condition she’d left in. And that just hadn’t been the case.

When I’d told Samantha I didn’t want her going out with those neanderthals anymore, she’d become insufferable. She refused to listen to my rules, which infuriated me, and she’d called me a controlling bitch… which, while probably true, was also necessary, considering she was shit at making good choices for herself.

Fuck me for caring, I guess.

It didn’t help that when I got attached to people, my monster did too, and it was dangerous for them.

My monster acted as a protector, for the most part, so if it felt like the people I cared about were a threat to me, it usually wanted to… You guessed it… kill them.

I’d managed to keep it from slaughtering Samantha for abandoning us, but it had been too close for comfort.

That had been a lesson.

I wasn’t capable of just having normal relationships. I would always be controlling, overprotective, and unreasonable, and the monster in my chest would always be violent, spiteful, and unpredictable.

Theo wouldn’t like that.

No one seemed to like that, if I was being honest, which is why I didn’t even bother to form friendships anymore.

But… Theo seemed to be this strange anomaly. I’d never masked in front of her, and she still gave me those annoyingly adorable puppy-dog eyes all the time. She still seemed to like me, even though the first time I met her, I’d literally shoved my nail in an open cut on her face to make a point.

As much as I loved that so much it borderline turned me on, it was still problematic in its own right.

I was starting to understand that Theo liked being hurt. Why else would she do what she did for a living?

And if Theo ended up on my list, I wouldn’t allow anyone to hurt her. I would expect her to take better care of her body because if I truly leaned into what my obsessive mind was telling me to do, her body would belong to me.

She would belong to me.

And like I said.

I took very good care of my belongings.

Whether they liked it or not.

It was almost three am by the time I pulled into Fairview. All the lights were off in the main house, which meant Ryan and Cal were probably passed out.

I was grateful for that, as I didn’t want to have to deal with Callum giving me a hard time about swinging by Theo’s place in the wee hours of the morning.

I’d never hear the end of it.

My Pumas made no sound as I slipped out of my Audi and onto the paved driveway that led to Theo’s guesthouse.

Her place was tucked behind the gothic mansion that housed the funeral home, and it looked like a mini version of the main house. It was painted the same phthalo green with black trim, but the massive garden Iris and Ryan religiously tended to gave her tiny living quarters a more cottagey vibe.

I’d toyed with the idea of texting her before coming here, but I was worried she would just ignore me if she didn’t feel like talking… and, well, I didn’t really give a fuck if she didn’t feel like talking.

She was going to talk to me if I wanted her to.

I slinked up her front steps and shamelessly hammered on her door.

“Theodora!” I called, knowing from experience that the walls to this house were thin and she would hear me if she was inside.

After a few seconds, I paused, listening carefully for her signature lazy shuffle. That damn woman barely picked up her feet when she walked. It drove me nuts.

When I didn’t hear anything after a solid minute, that tight, panicky feeling in my chest intensified.

Maybe she hadn’t come home?