Page 38 of What Beats Within the Tunnels

“Can’t you sense my emotions? You should know exactly how I feel, Princess,” he retorts with a teasing grin.

“I don’t find this amusing. You’re clearly shielding your emotions from me. But that’s not the main issue. I need to understand what you feel for me. Remember that night a few months ago? The night I bared myself to you and you rejected me? You’ve pulled me close every night since, and you flirt shamelessly during the day. I’m not in this for mind games. I’m already weighed down with the simulations and training. Do you feel anything for me at all?” My voice wavers a touch, revealing the vulnerability I’m desperately trying to hide.

He looks deep into my eyes, and the teasing glint is gone, replaced by genuine concern and intensity. “Lyra, I’ve never been good at these conversations.” He pauses, and I feel something from him. It’s powerful, possibly lust, but he’s quick to keep his emotions locked up before he continues. “The moment I push myself away, it’s because I’m terrified of the intensity of my feelings for you. It’s not some light attraction. It’s strong, possessive, almost overwhelming. The way I am drawn to you, it scares me. I fear becoming that overbearing, dominant lover who might end up smothering the very fire that draws me to you. But know this, every time I’m near you, it’s a battle of restraint, not of disinterest.”

He takes a deep breath, propping up on his elbow. “The night you speak of, it wasn’t about you not being enough or about any past with Nyx. It was about me not trusting myself to stop once we crossed that line. I care about you more deeply than I’ve allowed myself to admit. But I’ve been trying to protect us both in my own flawed way.”

Reaching out, he gently cups my face, the warmth of his touch melting away some of the tension. “You deserve honesty, and here it is. I want you, Lyra, not for a night but in a way that’s all-consuming. But once we cross that line, there’s no going back.”

Swallowing hard, my eyes search his for any hint of deceit. “Colton, it’s not about us or moving on from Nyx. It’s about trust and understanding. I’ve been trying to figure out where we stand, deciphering these mixed signals. I mean, a few months ago I couldn’t stand you, but somewhere along the way I think we became friends and now… I want something more. I want something real, and if that’s not what you want, then tell me. But if you genuinely feel this way about me, why keep me at arm’s length? Why this tug-of-war? I can’t handle another heartbreak. I need to know I can trust you with my heart.”

The last words come out as a whisper, betraying the depth of my vulnerability, although I’m probably projecting my feelings to him right now anyways.

His eyes darken briefly. “Lyra, my struggle has never been about trusting you. It’s about trusting myself with you. Every time someone so much as looks at you, I want to mark you as mine to ensure no one else ever dares to touch what belongs to me. That level of possession, of dominance...scares me. Not because I think it’s wrong but because I know I won’t be able to control it once I fully give in. I’ve been holding back not to protect you—from the depth of my feelings and the force of my nature. But make no mistake, every fiber of my being screams to claim you, to make sure everyone knows you’re mine. Can you handle that kind of intensity?”

The silence between us lingers as I digest his words. Gods, I was already attracted to him, but hearing him express his possessiveness like that? It’s intoxicating. The urge to devour him is overwhelming, regardless of how reckless it might be.

“I’ve never shied away from intensity. In fact, I yearn for the very possessiveness you’re talking about. I want to be the only woman in your eyes, the only one you touch in that way.” Propping myself up on my elbow, I draw our faces tantalizingly close. In a sultry whisper, I challenge, “So if you’re wondering whether I can handle you...why not show me how intense you really are?” I surprise even myself with how daring I am tonight. The words are barely out of my mouth, and he’s pushing me back and climbing on top of me.

He captures both of my hands in one of his, pinning them above my head against the pillows. With his free hand, he hikes up my nightgown, revealing my breasts. He squeezes one, the weight of his touch both tender and demanding. He stares down at me, hunger evident in his eyes, as if he’s starving and I’m the only feast that can satisfy him. Those eyes glow with an intensity I’ve never seen before. With his shields down, his emotions flood me— raw, unbridled need. And I reciprocate that need, wholly and fiercely. It’s impossible to distinguish where his emotions end and mine begin; our desires are seamlessly intertwined.

He leans down, intending to close the distance between our lips. But before he can claim the kiss, I dart my tongue out, tasting his bottom lip then drawing it into my mouth with a gentle bite. The pressure isn’t enough to harm, but it’s sufficient to elicit a deep growl from him. His lips meet mine in earnest, his kiss nothing short of ravenous. His tongue sweeps in, strong and assertive, as if laying claim to every corner of my mouth. The sensation is dizzying, like experiencing a true kiss for the first time, drawing soft, involuntary moans from deep within me. I can sense his arousal, hard and insistent against me even through the layers of his clothes. Instinctively, I arch my hips up, seeking friction against that enticing pressure.

He breaks the kiss, uttering, “Fuck,” as he looks down, taking in our intimate contact. Encouraged, I grind against him again, feeling his grip on my wrists tighten in response.

“Don’t forget what I said before. The first time I take you,” he murmurs, his voice low and thick with desire, “it won’t be in your father’s palace, where you’d have to stifle your screams.” His words make me writhe beneath him, the anticipation almost unbearable. I marvel at his restraint— every fiber of my being yearns for him, and I know he feels the same overpowering urgency.

“Colton, please,” I plead, my voice laced with desperation and need.

“Shh,” he whispers against my ear, his breath sending shivers down my spine. “You’ll never have to beg, my little shadowmancer. I’ll always give you exactly what you need.” He kisses me tenderly, lips moving delicately against mine. His touch grows bolder as his hand trails down, fingers teasing over my sensitive skin, making my breath catch in my throat when his thumb presses against my clit.

A moan escapes me as he deepens his exploration, pressing a finger inside me and then another, each movement deliberate and intoxicating. “Look at me, Lyra,” he demands, voice filled with authority. I meet his eyes, trapped in the glowing intensity of them. The connection is unbreakable, even as pleasure builds, threatening to overtake me. He thrusts his fingers in and out, curling inside me all while his thumb circles my clit, each touch designed to draw out sounds of pure ecstasy. As my climax approaches, his thumb finds the exact spot to send me spiraling. I bite down on my bottom lip, fighting to contain the scream threatening to escape.

He kisses me, a comforting kiss amidst the overwhelming sensations, keeping me grounded until my body relaxes and the tremors subside. As he withdraws his touch, a feeling of emptiness emerges, my body already missing his presence. I rid myself of my slip, not wanting the barrier of fabric between us, craving the warmth of his skin. He rolls on his side and pulls me close to him, my head pressed to his chest, his heartbeat a soothing lullaby, pulling us both into sleep.

Chapter 15

Colton

She’s a vision when she sleeps, vulnerable and unguarded. I’ve been up for a while now, watching her, relishing in the tranquility that eludes her when she’s awake. Last night was...intense, and the girl needs her rest. These relentless training sessions are grueling, not just for her but for me too. Every bruise, every mark on her feels like a punch to my gut. Euric and Athalda, those scheming bastards, treat her like some tool. Their intentions might be to strengthen her, but I don’t trust them for a godsdamn second.

Zomea’s in trouble, and what Drew has told me about Eguina, the lurking shadows in Cloudrum, it’s clear danger is creeping closer to Nighthold. It’s a damn good thing Lyra wants to see the Dream Forest. I don’t like the idea of leaving her, but I don’t like being away from home for this long. Bim and Dorian should have things under control there, unless Nyx pulls some of his usual stunts.

Speaking of Nyx, the mere thought of that prick sets my blood boiling. The idea of his hands on her... He had his chance and squandered it. She won’t be his pawn again. I don’t care what the prophecy says. His light won’t be saving her. They cannot be destined to be together.

I think she is finally starting to heal from the pain he caused her. Lately, her sleep’s been a bit calmer. I wonder if she even knows how fitful she is in sleep. Our tether lets me feel her inner turbulence now more than ever. There’s a depth of pain she doesn’t show the world, but I sense it. She’s healing, bit by bit. For all the disdain I hold for Euric and Athalda, I have to admit that they’ve forced her to grow, to hone her strength.

It’s hard to believe it’s been only twelve weeks, but the change in her is undeniable...my shadow. I’ve noticed her reactions to my pet names for her—shadowmancer, dark enchantress, I think they’re growing on her. But there’s something simple and intimate about my shadow. I can’t wait to witness the full force of her power once she learns to master those shadows she’s destined to control.

I don’t know what Nyx’s plans for her were, but I’d bet he was scheming a way to harness her dark magic. That fucker is as power-hungry as the rest of them. He probably wants to wed her so he can be the king of all of Eguina, not just Nighthold. I don’t necessarily think he’s a bad king, but I don’t trust him, especially not around her.

Lyra stretches and then nestles against my chest again. Gods, the sensation of her skin against mine... She’s so incredibly smooth and beautiful. It’s baffling how I got this lucky. I could’ve taken her that first night when she boldly climbed atop me, but the timing felt off. We had been drinking, and she was in pain. I didn’t want any potential regrets on her end.

When Euric informed me about the tether a few days back, I wanted to share it with her, but it felt essential she came to her own conclusion, untainted by my influence. I hoped she’d be in favor, but I was mentally prepared for any choice she made. But last night, fuck... The overwhelming emotions she radiated as I caressed her, I’m surprised I held my composure and didn’t embarrass myself like some inexperienced schoolboy.

I gently slide my hand over the back of her head, savoring the feel of her silky hair weaving between my fingers. Twirling a wavy strand, I then allow it to fall back into its place. It will be interesting to witness Nyx’s reaction when he learns about our tether.

My shadow is awake. She is very bad at keeping that shield up, and the happy, content emotions she’s radiating right now are making my dick hard. She sighs and stretches her body, pressing against mine like she craves the connection between us as much as I do. She tips her head back, and those eyes… Starring into her eyes is like plunging into the depths of a tempestuous sea, where the clear blue of the shallows meets the mysterious green of the abyss, beautiful and turbulent.