Page 37 of The True-Blue Romance

Oh.

He’s going to end our friendship because I can’t… can’t get past my feelings. He’s figured me out. Oh god. I whisper out an “okay” just before covering my mouth to hold back the sobs that desperately want to escape.

Joey clears his throat once, squares his shoulders, then starts to read.

“Dear Drew,” Joey says quietly, voice shaking with the words. “I am sorry I’ve made you feel like you can’t tell me how you feel. I’m sorry for making you feel for one minute that you have to hide something about yourself from me. And I’m sorry for making you feel for even one second that you’re unlovable in the way you most deserve.” Joey pauses and fiddles with the paper, still refusing to look up at me. My heart pounds so hard I feel ill. “But I’m mostly sorry for not understanding that when I look at you, it’s not like a best friend. When I look at you, everything falls together. Your smile makes me feel like I could conquer the world. And when I touch you, my world makes sense. I think I’ve had feelings for you for years but didn’t understand them. This isn’t because of Savannah, this isn’t because of anyone else. I think I just woke up one day and realized when you give me that smile that’s only ever just for me, that I want to keep it tucked into my heart for the entire day. I love you, like a best friend, and like more, and I hope that’s okay. I’m sorry if these words aren’t good,” Joey says with a heavier tremor to his voice. He finally looks up as he says, “But I hope maybe you and I can finally love each other at the same time.”

The room is quiet save for the sound of the pounding rain outside.

Joey looks at me, and I look right back, my world finally reorienting after years out of orbit.

“You love me?” I ask quietly, my hands shaking as I fight to stay standing.

Joey nods slowly, lips curving up slightly. “I didn’t realize… Not until the possibility of losing you. I know I… I’ve never been with a man. But I don’t care. Can I—” Joey pauses and huffs, pushing off the bed to stand in front of me. He reaches out to touch me but pauses like he always does, to wait for my permission. And something about that cracks me wide open more than his words ever could. “Can I kiss you?”

Maybe I’m dreaming.

Maybe I drowned at the spring and this is the afterlife I deserve after a life of pain.

“Okay,” I say quietly.

Joey smiles shyly, his hands lifting to cup my bearded cheeks. He rubs his thumbs under my eyes, and I feel the wetness of my tears that he’s wiping away. My breath catches painfully when he steps closer, lips an inch away, and just as his lips cover mine, a sharp boom of thunder rents through the humid air. I gasp against his mouth, and he uses it as an opportunity to deepen the kiss, his mouth moving hard over mine like he’s gotten his first sip of water after years of drought. This isn’t like that gentle, hesitant kiss Joey gave me in the orange groves when we were teens. Compared to this, that kiss was a slight breeze on a windless day. No, this kiss is a hurricane and relief.

“Oh god,” Joey moans into my mouth.

My back slams against a wall, and I wrap my arms around his shoulders to tug him closer. His body is warm and alive next to mine. Everything about Joey’s body is hard and unrelenting, mine soft as he presses harder against me while our mouths seem to try to memorize each other. His hands move from my cheeks to the back of my neck, his fingers tangling in the slight curls there. He uses his hands to tilt my head so he can kiss me deeper, his tongue tangling with mine, and I all but melt.

Every single molecule in my body belongs to Joey in this moment.

Any doubt about all this is erased when I feel Joey’s hard cock against mine when he rocks into me. He’s hard because of me. Oh god, I want everything all at once. The entire world is open to me now. But also, what if this is just a fluke for tonight? I should take advantage of it.

Joey pulls away from my mouth to dot kisses across my cheeks. He’s murmuring words I can’t understand as he gently moves my head back to kiss down my throat. I swallow hard, overheated and desperate with desire. The house suddenly feels a million degrees warmer than it was just moments ago.

“This is crazy,” Joey murmurs with a manic laugh. “I want to crawl inside you.”

“There’s no way this is real,” I wonder aloud.

“Drew, I’m in love with you,” Joey says, as if he knows exactly what my brain is trying to say. He places a sharp kiss to the tender skin of my neck, making me gasp and buck against him. “Tell me what you want. I want to make you feel good, make you feel loved.”

“Just this, oh my god.”

“Come on,” Joey urges when he pulls away, leaving me cold and pained. But all he does is tug me toward the bed, settling me down into the middle of it with his big hands. My world rights itself for the second time this evening when Joey joins me on my bed, all long limbs and messy black curls. His smile is brighter than I’ve ever seen it. He splays one of those big hands on my chest, right over my heart. “Did I say the right words?”

I cup his cheek, fighting the urge to cry when he tilts his face into my palm, certainly seeking comfort from me. This moment is bigger than both of us, I think.

“I’ve loved you since we were sixteen.”

“Andrew,” Joey pleads, eyes filling with tears. “I’m so sorry I made you wait so long.”

“You’re here now. Kiss me again.”

“Whatever you want, forever.”

And then he’s kissing me again, his body pressing me down into the bed. Joey’s kisses are an anchor as the storm rages outside. He tastes nothing like I imagined, but somehow like everything I’ve always wished for. His lips are soft and delicate, but his kiss is demanding and harsh. The perfect dichotomy for Joey as a person. My legs fall open as he rolls to rest between my thighs, and I groan again when his cock presses against mine.

Joey pulls away, lifting up on his arms to stare down at me. His hair is a mess from my fingers, lips kiss-bitten red and swollen, a dark flush on his cheeks. I never thought I’d have the chance to see him this way. I try to memorize him in case this is the only night I get, but Joey seems to read my mind like he always does.

“I want you so much, nothing’s gonna scare me away,” Joey vows, his hips moving slightly over mine.