Page 50 of Chalk It Up

She suddenly gets really shy which is a part of her I honestly don’t think I’ve ever seen before. “Tonights not about me, it’s about you.”

“Very good deflecting but I feel like every time we’ve been together for the last two months it’s been about me. Dish. There’s something going on.” I catch myself. I can get overzealous about things. “But obviously whenever you’re ready. If that’s not tonight, I definitely understand. But if there’s something I can help you with or, in Thea fashion, a body I can bury, I’m there.” She laughs but it doesn’t meet her eyes.

She sets both her hands on the kitchen island while I stand patiently on the other side. She drops her head down with a deep sigh. I hope she doesn’t feel like she has to tell me anything. “Really, if you’re not ready, please don’t worry. I’m here in any way you need me.”

“No, I want to talk about it. I do.” She expels another deep breath and it seems like she’s hoping for her story to leave with her oxygen and just exist in the atmosphere around us. So I just wait. “I’ve been seeing Emmett.” My eyes bulge out of my head but she’s still looking down. She takes a moment to regroup and then meets my stunned eyeline. “Please say something, I’m so sorry.”

I’m baffled for so many reasons. “Thea, what? Why are you sorry? Since when? How long? This is amazing!”

“It’s a really long story.”

I get to work the next day, thanks to Thea giving me a ride, only to find August already in the school parking lot way too early and working on my car. This man is always coming to my rescue and I’m positive it would take a lifetime to repay him. I get over to where he’s parked next to mine and doing something under the hood that I’m clueless about. I sneak a peek into his SUV to see Addie taking a nap in her seat. It is way earlier than the students would usually be here and I suddenly feel extremely guilty for something I didn’t ask for.

“What’re you doing?” I ask August kindly while looking at absolutely nothing under my hood since I don’t know what I’m looking at.

“Seems like I’m saving you again. It might be time to get you a new car.” There’s no one here yet and Addie is asleep facing away from us so he drops a quick kiss to the top of my head.

“Yeah, sure. I’ll add that to the list of things I need right next to a house that’s my own and a new wardrobe.”

“So it sounds like you’ll add it to a list of things that I want to get for you.” I raise my eyebrow at him incredulously because there’s no way he really just said he would get me a new car.

“You are not buying me a new car.”

“Why not? I can afford it. You need it. And it’ll save me time fixing this thing and I know I won’t have to worry about you.” All very valid points, but it makes me feel uncomfortable.

“Let’s table that idea for the time being. Do you have time for a quick conversation?”

“Well, I just need to wait for Addie’s teacher to be ready to accept her into the class, but she can be kind of difficult sometimes, so I think I’ve got a few minutes.” He winks at me and I’m suddenly the puddle of oil or coolant or whatever it is that’s dripping under my car.

He slams the hood closed, seemingly satisfied with whatever he did. “Haha, very funny. So, in all seriousness, where do you want to go from here with our relationship?”

He wipes his hands on a rag I didn’t notice he was holding and the muscles in his forearms cord. I didn’t know that was something that would do it for me, but here we are. “I think we keep doing what we have been and tell Addie at the end of the year. Everything feels secure right now, but I don’t want to risk your job again.” I’m beyond grateful that we’re somehow both on the same page. He’s so perfect for me it almost makes me sick.

“I was thinking the same exact thing.” I say in relief. “So we have a lot of porch dates for the next few months. You think you’re up for that many late nights, old man?”

“You shut it. I’m barely in my thirties. Are you allowed to stay out past your bed time?” He shoves at me playfully.

“I don’t know. I’ll have to ask my new landlord for permission.” He tosses a cute wink my way.

“Well, about that. When these five or so months are up, I want you to know you have options.” He says while guiding us over to the hood of his car so we can both lean against it.

“Oh do I?”

“Ha, of course.” He chuckles and we both stare out to the sunrise. Sunrises and sunsets always look best in parking lots. But I also think everything looks better just being with August. “I bought that house, so obviously I don’t want you to pay any rent. I paid for it outright so there’s nothing to be paid on it except property taxes which I can cover.” This also makes me feel wildly uncomfortable. I hate feeling like I owe someone something even though I know for certain August would never make me feel that way.

“I also want you to know it's essentially yours forever.” He pauses like the next thought physically pains him. “Even if you and I don’t work out, I’ll happily put the house in your name. I never want you to think you’re trapped or I’m using it to keep you with me.” Well, that won’t be an issue because I’m definitely not going anywhere.

He kicks a small rock around with his shoe chewing over the rest of what he wants to say. Nervous August might be my favorite August. This is so precious and different compared to his usually confident demeanor. “But like I said, you have options.” He’s still staring at his little rock like it’s going to offer him some support. “Um, no pressure kind of options. After the school year is over, if you want…well, you’re more than welcome to live with me and Addie.”

He finally pulls his gaze up to mine to find me smiling like an idiot back at him. I’ve been waiting to hear those exact words. I want this. I want everything with him. I’m nodding my head up and down frantically and he visibly relaxes. I would go in to hug him but the sun is just high enough now that I know people are going to start pulling up, so I just lightly brush his fingers with mine.

“I would absolutely love that.”

“Would you really? That’s a huge life change going from living by yourself to essentially having a whole family.” His reluctance for me bums me out, but not enough to bring down the spirit.

“I really would. I want nothing more than to be with you and Addie every day. I hate the times I go home and I feel like I’m missing out on all of the best parts of my life. Like things are happening without me when I should absolutely be there to take part in it all.” I hope I’m pumping enough reassurance into him that I don’t feel guilted into this situation. “But, hey, if I move in, what are you going to do with the cottage? Rent it out?”

“Do you have any ideas for that?”