Page 106 of Never Too Late to Date

‘But I know the truth now. It’s not something I can forget, just like that…’

The clicking of her son’s fingers was loud in her ear.

‘I am sorry, Gianni, for everything. I never meant for you to find out the truth. And especially not like this.’

‘But why, Mama, why did you lie? Did you not love Christian? Did you not want to give yourselves a chance?’

Her elder son had always been a romantic, far more so than his brother. She owed it to him to be honest.

‘I can only speak for myself. I think we were in love back then, if we knew what love was, but we were too young to make a go of it. Christian was on the way up; he was becoming more and more well known in Britain. And with that fame comes pressure, pressure to be at the right places, be with the right people, and to use anything you can to help you perform, night after night.’

‘Are you talking about alcohol and drugs?’

‘As I say, that’s not my story.’

She wasn’t about to slag Christian off in front of his son.

‘What I will say is that I got to the point where I wasn’t sure if I trusted him totally. And once I realised I was pregnant with you, I couldn’t risk that for my precious baby.’

She reached over to take her son’s hand a moment.

‘Please don’t judge me. I was barely more than a girl. I fled to Greece to give myself time to think and met and fell in love with your father. It was totally unexpected but wonderful.’

‘And very handy.’

Suzie snatched her hand away.

‘No, Gianni mou. That’s mean. It wasn’t handy; it was real. I’d left behind all I knew, and I could see a life here with your father. Those split-second decisions can turn your life upside down. Who knows if they’re right or wrong? But you can’t go through life with huge regrets hanging over you. I have no regrets about choosing your father and bringing you up in Greece. You had a childhood full of sunshine, sea and close family. Don’t try and tell me that I did a bad thing, please.’

Her son’s smile when it finally broke through was worth the wait.

‘I have no complaints about my upbringing, Mama. Or having a father, a brother … and a mother … that I love dearly.’

‘Well then.’

The smile faded like a shadow falling over his face.

‘But there’s no way I can call this man “father.” Panos is my father and always will be.’

‘I get it. I really do. But is there any way you can see a place for Christian in your life somewhere?’

Why was she petitioning on behalf of a man who, up until recently, hadn’t even known his son existed?

‘As what? A friend, an older brother, a spiritual guide? You tell me. What exactly are you envisioning, Mama? I’d really like to know.’

The bitterness in his voice shocked her to the core. She’d hoped he’d at least give Christian a chance. They weren’t getting very far.

‘I just thought⁠—’

‘Spit it out, Mama.’

‘You’ve grown into a lovely man, Gianni mou. I know I would say that because you’re my son, but I’ve seen you fight so hard for others to get justice. Being fair is in your DNA, and I just thought maybe you could apply a little of that generosity of spirit here.’

She paused to let the words sink in.

‘So, are you asking me to accept this man as a second father? Daddy One and Daddy Two? So I can pick whichever one suits me on a particular day?’

‘Now you’re just being ridiculous.’