Page 80 of Never Too Late to Date

He was so close she could smell his woody aftershave again. They needed to get this over with. She handed him one of the bottles.

‘Beer?’

‘Sure, thanks.’

She chose one of the few clear tables back from the stage, in case anyone wandered in. The stars provided their only light, which gave her a moment of panic, thinking he might see it as some sort of romantic set-up.

‘Cheers.’

He reached over to clink bottles with her, while she studiously tried to avoid looking in his eyes. It was supposed to be seven years bad sex if you looked away or some such nonsense. The bad sex had been going on longer than that, so she must have done something wrong already. Why was she thinking about sex anyway? This was a practical chat about the situation they faced. She leant forward, but he spoke first.

‘Suze, I’m honestly not here to blow your life up.’

It was a good start, better than she’d expected.

‘That’s the first good news I’ve had all day.’

‘But…’

‘But’ wasn’t so good. She held her breath.

‘I do want the chance to get to know my son a bit better if that’s possible.’

Suzie sighed.

‘It’s not going to be my decision.’

‘I know, but surely you can help me a little.’

‘He’s not even speaking to me at the moment.’

She hadn’t meant to let that slip out. She wasn’t looking for his pity.

‘Don’t stress. It’s only been a day since we both found out, and I’m not expecting miracles. I was angry yesterday, so angry that I couldn’t see straight, and I’m sure he was too. But I’ve spent the day on the beach, thinking.’

‘How lovely for you.’

She’d spent the day having tricky conversations, working like a dog and crying a lot.

He gave her a sharp look. There wasn’t any point antagonising him. But he was making it all sound so simple. She stared down at the table.

‘I’m trying here. We were just kids back then. I’m still upset that you didn’t come to me as soon as you found out, but I realise now I wasn’t in the right place to deal with anything that major. I’ll admit I wasn’t ready to be a father, although I still would have liked to have been given the choice…’

His voice had softened and faded, and when she managed to look him directly in the eye at last, she could see tears waiting there.

‘I’m sorry again for not telling you… But, as you say, you so weren’t ready. You were wild back then, in every way, and determined to make it to the top. Nothing was going to stand in your way, including a pregnant girlfriend.’

Christian put his bottle down on the table rather loudly, which made her jump.

‘You make me sound like some sort of drug-crazed maniac, flitting from woman to woman while stepping on my rivals.’

Suzie raised her eyebrows, which made him smile at least.

‘I’m not putting all the blame on you…’

‘Sounds a bit like it.’

‘If I’m being honest, I’m not sure I was ready to be a mother at twenty-two either. Finding out I was pregnant was a total shock.’