Page 25 of Cross’s Reckoning

"I fell first."

My heart gives a stupid little kick. "I know."

"No, you don't." He draws me closer. "I was fucked long before you ever noticed."

"That's extremely romantic."

"I'm trying here."

I smile despite everything. "Carry on."

His other arm circles my waist. "You want the truth? I fell first, harder and like a complete fucking idiot. Happy?"

"Getting there."

"You're a pain in my ass."

"You love it."

His expression changes. Not enough to make the word into a declaration, but enough that I feel it. "Yeah," he says. "I do."

Then he kisses me. There isn't any anger in the way I kiss him back, no score to settle and no need to prove which one of us wanted the other more. There's still urgency because my father could reach these gates at any time, but it doesn't feel borrowed from fear.

Cross's hands slide beneath my shirt and I lift my arms without making him stop. My clothes come off more slowly than they did before, not because either of us wants less, but because this time we're not racing years of frustration. When I push him backward onto the bed, his mouth curves.

"What?"

"Nothing."

"Your face is doing that thing again."

"What thing?"

"Being annoying."

I climb over him in response, and when Cross's hands settle on my thighs, I catch both his wrists before he can move them higher.

"Let me."

His eyes darken. "Wasn't going to argue."

"Good."

I kiss him, slower this time, taking my time because I can. There is something deeply satisfying about watching the man who spent years controlling every reaction lose that ability under my hands. By the time I wrap my fingers around him, Cross's breathing has changed.

"Lola."

"Still got something clever to say now?"

"Nope. Apparently not," he breathes.

"Excellent."

I lower my mouth to his chest, then lower, and his hand knots in the sheet instead of reaching for me. Every reaction he gives me feels like something freely handed over, and tonight I want all of them. Eventually Cross catches me beneath the arms and pulls me back up.

"I wasn't finished."

"Neither am I."