Page 171 of Shadowing You

Someone knocked, and she went to the door and cracked it, then returned to the bed and kissed his temple. “I’ll be back in a few minutes.”

“Where are you going?”

But she walked out, and then the doorway filled with his father.

Gavin looked like he’d aged ten years since Ethan had seen him…whatever day they’d flown to New Hampshire. He hadn’t shaved, and his stubble was gray. Dark skin circled his eyes, and his wrinkles had deepened.

“Geez, you look worse than I do,” Ethan said. “And I got shot.”

His remark earned a smile, but it didn’t hold. Gavin lowered himself into the bedside chair. “Your wife’s giving us a minute.”

“Okay.”

Gavin set his forearms on his knees and studied his own hands. When he spoke, his voice was rough. “It was my fault they found you. I thought you’d be safe. The house isn’t in my name, but…” He swallowed. “Lu Feng knew all about our family. I don’t know how, but he knew about me and my company and Derrick’s plane.”

“How do you know this?”

“One of the men who was taken into custody—a guy named Yao Bowen—told us.”

Bowen. Was that Bo, the one who’d nearly beaten him to death?

“Lu got the flight plan,” Gavin continued, “and then searched real estate records near where we landed and found the house, owned by Wright Industries, which is…” He pressed his lips flat. “He found you because of me. You and Mei Lin almost died on that mountain because I was sloppy. Because I wanted you close.”

“You got us out of China.” Ethan pressed the button to raise his head. “You brought us to a safe place—or a place that should’ve been safe. And you sent people to protect us. You saved our lives more than once. You don’t get to turn that into something you owe me for.”

Gavin’s jaw worked, and his eyes turned glassy. “I was a terrible father.” He seemed to be staring at the floor, or his shoes. Apparently, at anything but Ethan. “I didn’t know how to be a good dad to you without sacrificing my family. That’s not an excuse, I know. I wanted to tell the girls about you years ago, but Evelyn…” His voice trailed, and Ethan got it. Gavin’s loyalty was to his wife, exactly where it needed to be.

“She had five daughters to protect,” Ethan said. “And a marriage to save. That came first.”

“I chose them.” Gavin seemed to force himself to meet Ethan’s eyes. “Over and over, I chose them, and every time I did, it was at your expense. I should have found another way. I should’ve⁠—”

“Dad.”

Gavin’s eyes rounded. Then the corner of his mouth pulled up. “You haven’t called me that—without sarcasm, anyway—since you were nine years old.”

“I can be kind of a jerk.”

Chuckling, his father puffed up like he was proud. “You get that from me.”

“That and a lot of other things, I think. Maybe even some good things.”

“Yeah. Maybe.”

The door opened, and Gavin stood and stepped out of the way, dragging a hand down his face.

An orderly set Ethan’s meal on the adjustable table. “You need anything else? More water?”

“Sure. Thanks.”

She was walking out as Mei Lin came in with coffee. “I can wait in the hall if⁠—”

“I’ll be here if you need me.” Gavin squeezed Ethan’s good shoulder and left.

Mei Lin fussed with the food, removing the lid that kept it warm, unrolling the silverware from the napkin. “You okay?”

Okay? That word didn’t cover it. Ethan’s chest was full to splitting, and it had nothing to do with his cracked ribs.

He’d spent his whole life expecting the people who’d claimed they loved him to leave. His father had left, over and over. Even his mother, when she’d married, had left. And Mei Lin… It hadn’t been her choice, but the facts didn’t change how it had felt to, once again, be left alone.