Page 5 of Fractured Empire

“Yeah, maybe,” I agree reluctantly. “Maybe I should have told them to bring the cats. Leo would lose his mind.”

Dad chuckles lightly. “Jade and Ana will take good care of their cats for now. But if things need brightening up over there, I’m sure Rayna wouldn’t mind bringing them over for a while.”

Apollo having cats is not something I ever pictured for his future, but what his wife wants, she gets. Leo and Bastian adore the little feline creatures, but they’re staying in their home for now. We don’t want to disrupt their lives while they’re still growing, if we can.

“Will you tell everyone else?” I ask, my throat tightening with tension.

He already told me that he could handle informing the family when the time came, but I want to be sure he hasn’t changed his mind. It will be a difficult task, informing all his children that one of our own is gone. To tell them that a secret has been kept from them for a long time. Most of my siblings will be understanding, some will be sad, others may even be devastated. Whether it’s for my loss, for my sons losing their mother, or for Cleo in general.

Melani’s reaction is the one I’m the least prepared to deal with. She’s Cleo’s only friend, but my wife hasn’t been a very good friend to her. She has no idea what’s been going on, and Cleo dying is going to hit her hard no matter how new their friendship is. Melani doesn’t have very many friends either, after all.

“Of course I will,” he agrees, his tone caring but firm. “Do you want me to come with Apollo? Even just for the day?”

My first reaction is the urge to say no. To brush off his offer and tell him that I’ll be fine. I’m a grown-ass man. A man who may have just lost his wife, but a wife who shared no love with him. I should tell him not to bother, that I won’t need him here, and that he has more important things to do. But I’m not fine. I have no fucking idea what I’m feeling or thinking, but I know that having my father here might be what helps me figure it out.

“If you have time,” I say thickly. “The boys would love to see you.”

I need you.

“I’ll be there,” Dad tells me without pause. “Let me make a few calls, and I’ll be ready to go when Apollo and Rayna are all packed up. It shouldn’t be long. Call me back if you need me, Leon. I don’t care if it’s only a few minutes from now, or an hour, okay?”

My throat bobs in a heavy swallow. “Yeah, okay. I will.”

“Don’t sit in silence while you’re waiting for us, all right? I know it’s the middle of the night, and I know you’re not going to get any sleep at this rate, but don’t just stare at the wall while your mind runs wild. Turn on some music, or a show, or go work out. Hell, pull a guard in from duty and spar with him. Do anything besides being alone with your thoughts, will you? We’ll only be a few hours. We’d be faster if there wasn’t a drive.”

“Okay, I can do that.” I push off of the kitchen counter. “Cleo’s hospice nurse is going to stay here until her body is picked up anyway, so I don’t have to worry about the boys waking up and trying to go see her.”

“Exactly,” he agrees. “You don’t have to just sit and wait. Keep your mind occupied with anything else.”

It’s good advice, great advice even. I don’t know how productive I’ll be able to be at this time of night, but maybe sparring with a guard will help shut the doomsday brain thoughts out.

“Yeah, all right. Talk soon?”

“Yes, we’ll talk soon, and I’ll be there shortly, Son.”

I hang up before he does, and take a moment to just breathe, allowing the reality of the day to settle over me. Cleo is dead, the boys are asleep, Rayna and Apollo are coming to stay, and my father is coming to visit. There’s nothing I can do to change anything bad that’s happened, but there are people around me who are making an effort to make it better.

I’ve always been grateful for having a family as strong as mine, but I’ve never thought about needing them like this. If I didn’t have this support system, I don’t know where I would be right now. Probably binge drinking something that tastes like lighter fluid and staring at a wall or standing on the top of my roof just daring the wind to pull me closer to the edge.

I’d like to think I could be strong enough for my kids all on my own, but I don’t know how I would act. I guess it doesn’t really matter, though. I have my family, and they’re coming. No matter how hard the boys take the news of their mother passing, they’ll have people surrounding them to console them. They won’t be allowed to be alone and in pain, not while we’re here to make it better.

Instead of pulling out a bottle of something I’ll regret later, I steady myself and head to the security office. I know I have enough guards on duty that pulling one away won’t put our safety at risk, and I know there’s more than a few men on shift who could give me a good fight in the ring.

It doesn’t take long before I’ve singled one out and it takes even less time before we’re throwing punches. Each hit feels like a bout of normalcy. Each sting signals a new possible bruise, but somehow it feels more like salvation than pain. Sparring is something that I already do regularly to keep up my strength. Underbosses aren’t as powerful as Capos, but in some ways, we’re even more respected. We do all of the same things, but at a greater distance from the family stronghold.

I keep up my training not only for my safety, but to keep the respect of the people around me. No one wants a weak leader who lets himself go. And something tells me, the death of my wife is going to push me into more strenuous training. I won’t be the Underboss who loses his edge due to grief, I’ll be the one who becomes stronger because of it.

Chapter Two

Leon

Cleo’s request and her subsequent death plays like flashes in the back of my mind now that my sparring session has ended. It started just after I finished showering, the vivid memory almost causing me to slip on my tiled bathroom floor.

“You want me to kill you,” I accuse.

“I want you to give me pain medicine and sit with me while I die,” she corrects as if it’s any different. “I’m going to stop breathing anyway, Leon. This way it’s on my terms, and it’s not alone in the middle of the night. I want to go while I’m not scared. I’m ready. The boys know I’m going, and I want it to be before they can’t recognize me anymore.”

I swallow hard, leaning over my double sink as my hands grip the edge of the hard stone countertop. The damp towel around my waist suddenly feels too tight, and the steam in the room becomes stifling rather than relaxing. There’s so much space in here, but it’s never felt smaller. The main suite of my house has just become a reminder that my life is fucked up, and has been for years and years.