Page 196 of Interion

“Well, you've been doing a great job so far!”

He laughed scornfully this time. He clenched his jaw and let his desire give way to the wall he always built to keep it from seeping out. He let her feel all of it before slowly moving closer.

“You have no idea what a terrible job I've been doing!” He stopped and took a deep breath when he noticed her eyes widen. “Kyller, have you ever stopped to think that I wasn't just protecting my own life? If the pact completed when I sealed the bond, you'd be tied to my life, and I don't know how that pact would react—whether it would take your life along with mine.”

He was sad, furious, but also desperate. His partner's reaction frightened him. He didn't want to lose what he'd achieved, not after everything he'd been through to be by her side—he'd worked so hard to make it work. After every daily struggle, he simply couldn't let this fracture form between them. Not when they were so close to freedom.

“I already knew, you know?” Kyller said, resigned.

Hearing this, he grew confused and wary. Those words could mean countless different things.

“What are you talking about?”

“Come on, Zion. Let's stop pretending, okay? Do you think I'm so stupid I didn't realize all your old distance and hatred for the bond stems from how much it disrupted your life with her? For years you treated me like trash because I was the wrench that ended your relationship with the woman you really chose! The woman you truly loved!” Kyller pointed at the picture frame, at Kaori.

Zion thought she had to be joking. Every word coming out of her mouth couldn't be real. He couldn't keep up with all these increasingly absurd accusations.

“You must be going crazy!” he almost shouted, gesturing wildly. “You know damn well I distanced myself because of a pact I made to save your life! You're the woman I chose!”

“Bullshit!” she shouted back. “I was forced on you because of this damn bond!”

“And you're not wrong! When we first met, the bond is what brought us together, and it was also why I left Kaori. That's physiological, instinctive, and irrational, and I'd be lying if I said otherwise. But the truth is, after discovering the bond, I was captivated and chose to fight for you—not because you became my partner, but because of all the strength, grit, and courage engraved in your scars. I read the stories written all over your body! I found you, I saw what had been done to you! I saw how hard you fought. I saw all your medical reports and exams and learned roughly what you'd faced just to stay alive…” He choked on the lump rising in his throat; his vision blurred as memories flooded back. “I was there when you decided to fight and choose life. I was in that damn room!”

He was shouting for the first time, distraught by his own memories. She laughed humorlessly, shaking her head as if to deny the truth, as if she didn't want to hear it.

“Do you think I did all that just because you were my partner? I did it because I chose you! I risked everything because I wanted you in my life! I wanted the partnership! You have no idea how much I admired the courage I saw in your eyes that day. All of that showed me you were worth it! Not as my obligation, but as someone I truly wanted as my partner. I felt damn proud to have someone like you connected to me, damn it!”

“You said it yourself—when you found out about the kiss between me, Aish, and Hiro, that the bond prevented you from being with other people. So how can this not be just about the bond?”

He laughed bitterly. The wretched memory of Kyller caught between those two drove him insane.

“You tell me! If I hadn't hammered at the bond a thousand times like a madman, you would have gone ahead with both of them! So how can you tell me that if I'd wanted to—since I kept the bond blocked all that time—I couldn't have been with someone else, just like you?”

She thought for a few seconds, and he could barely keep still.

“Don’t lie to me, Zion.”

“These aren’t lies! Are you going to ignore everything I said at Lemon’s? Just ignore every word, throw away everything we have?”

She glared at him.

“What we have?” she shouted, slamming her hand on the counter. “What exactly do we have, Zion? We have nothing—just a trainer-student relationship.”

“You know that’s not true.” He took a step toward her. “You know our relationship goes far beyond that—it’s only complicated because of the deal.”

“You made it clear that the only thing drawing us together is desire from the bond. It’s not about me, it’s not about love!”

“Damn it, Kyller!” he shouted. “Do you really think I felt desire when I met you? When you were nearly dead, needing help, and worst of all—just a teenager.” She stared at him in shock. “Obviously none of those decisions were about desire! There was nothing sexual about any of it!”

She shook her head. She seemed incredulous, unwilling to believe his words—as if they were nothing but pretty lies designed to deceive her heart. Zion felt he was losing her. He needed to do something.

Kyller tried to push past him toward the stairs. On impulse, without thinking of the consequences, Zion grabbed her. She fought against his grip. He had to admit—with some pride—that she gave him trouble, but he managed to pin her against the wall with his body.

“Don’t run now. Don’t run from me,” he begged, struggling to keep his fury and desperation in check as he held her in place. “Don’t hide from the truth. Talk to me.”

“I think it’s hilarious that you want to tell me all this now that I’ve found out about Kaori! Where was all this before? Or is this just more lies you’re making up to shut me up and keep me in line?”

Kyller struggled and tried to break free, shattering whatever control he’d managed to place over his fear and anguish.