Page 128 of Big Dill

“Replica?” I rub the bridge of my nose, trying to assemble a sentence longer than one word. “That’s not⁠—”

“But she’s gone now,” Elise says smoothly. “Out of the way. So when you’re ready to admit what you’ve been doing, come find me.”

She turns toward the door. Pauses.

Gone now?

Out of the way?

What the ever-loving fuck?

Before I can ask what the hell that means, she’s already gone. I sit there for a full ten minutes, staring at nothing, replaying every word until my head starts to pound. When my brain finally kicks back into gear, I grab my phone, about to text Jami. If she’s still in a meeting, or out to dinner, I don’t want to interrupt her with a call. Maybe she doesn’t want to hear from you at all, dude. I set my phone back down, having no idea what to do.

I dig into my files but I can’t focus my mind. After an hour the place has emptied out for the day and when the evening staff arrive, I give up and go find Jaxon.

“Ready?”

He scrubs his face, drags a hand through his hair, and checks his phone one last time before shoving it into his back pocket. I pass him his crutches and we head out front, the night swallowing us whole.

The drive home is quiet in that heavy, loaded way. No music. No talking. Just the crunch of tires and the echo of our own thoughts. We pick at the leftover birthday food Ma insisted we take, neither of us really tasting it.

And Ma, does she really want me back with Elise? The thought sits wrong. I can’t figure it out, no matter how many times I turn it over.

I mutter something about being tired and escape upstairs, needing space before my head explodes. The shower runs hot, steam fogging the mirror, but it doesn’t touch the tightness in my chest. When I finally drop onto my bed, I stare at the ceiling, phone in hand, waiting. For a buzz. A name. Anything from Jami.

Nothing comes.

I toss. I turn. I check the screen so many times it’s practically muscle memory. Three a.m. creeps up on me before sleep finally drags me under. Morning light jolts me awake like a slap. My heart’s already racing as I reach for my phone.

Still nothing.

Okay. Now I’m officially distraught.

I shove out of bed, yank on sweats, and step into the hall. My knuckles rap against Jaxon’s door. “Jaxon, you up?”

“I’m up.”

I walk in to find him sitting against the headboard, rubbing sleep from his eyes. “Anything?” I ask. I don’t even try to mask the panic this time. If he thinks I’m her brother, then I’m going to act like one.

“Yeah,” he says slowly. “Came in late last night. She’s safe, but…”

“But what?” My pulse spikes.

He holds out his phone. “Why didn’t you wake me?” I blurt, already moving. I snatch it from his hand, my fingers clumsy, my chest tight as I read.

* * *

Jami: Hey bro. There was a mix-up with the meeting, and once I got to the city, I forgot how much I loved it. Heading back to Nova Scotia.

* * *

The words blur as something sinks low and heavy in my gut.

She’s leaving.

And she didn’t bother messaging me. Was I that unimportant to her?

“What the fuck?” I rasp, my heart pounding so hard I’m sure I’m about to crack a rib.