Page 19 of Tank

Thinking of how much her sister’s death was hurting her, Serenity let her tears fall. There was no point in keeping them at bay when she was here alone with Beth. She’d never cried this much with her parents being killed, and certainly not Helen. But Beth had been cruel and hateful, and that was why she’d been crying so much. She loved her very much, but she didn’t like her. Not at all. She was a person that you wouldn’t depend on if you had something important to do, nor would she have been there had you needed her for support. Beth had her own agenda, and she didn’t care who she hurt when she was taking care of her own needs over anything you wanted.

“I’m going to go home tonight and make love with Sherman. He’ll make me feel whole and loved, something that you wouldn’t understand, and I need him. Then we’ll get married. Or not. I don’t care if he weds me or not. So long as I can be with him for the rest of my life. And it will be a good life.” She thought of carrying his child, and she smiled. “We’ll have plenty of babies, too. Perhaps a dozen of them over our lifetime. They’ll know love unlike anything that you and I shared. For as many times as you told me that you hated me, I have begun to believe it. You were cruel to me to say those things, and I can only hope that someday I can forgive you. There was no reason for you to say anything like that to me when I was only trying to help you.”

She turned and looked at the bed where her sister had been lying for the last few weeks. It hadn’t taken her long to go from being robust to dying, and she thought that it might have been the best thing that could have happened. No more lingering in pain. Beth was free of it, and that was a good thing. She’d wish for anyone else to go quickly like her sister had, and that would be the end of it.

“I’m leaving here soon. They’ll pick up your body and prepare you for the service. I’ll see you at the graveside when I see Helen, but I won’t be sharing anything with you when I do her.” She thought about how she’d been able to acquire a place next to their parents for Beth, too, and was glad that Beth was on the other side of her parents so that Helen could have some peace and quiet. “You’ll have your own little space next to our parents. How’s that?”

“I was wondering when you would be coming home.” She was startled by Sherman talking to her, yet was happy too. “I didn’t know if you were going to stay all night or not.”

“Beth is gone. She died at eleven fifty-four. They said that the death certificate would be ready as soon as the day after tomorrow.” He said he was sorry. “I am as well. I wish I had been able to talk to her civilly, but that wasn’t to be. She died with her last breath, telling me how much she hated me.”

“I’m so sorry, honey. I should have been there with you.” She said that she was all right, she’d gotten to talk with Beth like she should have been all along. “You told her off, didn’t you? Good for you. If anyone deserved it, it was her. How are you holding up?”

“I’m waiting on the funeral home to come and pick her up. Remember, I’m only going to have a graveside service for her because it’s doubtful that anyone around here would have known her. She’d not lived here since she’d been eighteen.” He told her that he remembered. “I thought you might. You remember everything I tell you, and I love you for that. You’re the best thing that has ever happened to me.”

“And you me. I want you to know that I will love you more tomorrow, too, and then more the next. You are my heart and soul, and I don’t want another day to go by without us being together.” She told him that she was happy for that. “I’ll be waiting up for you tonight. Then, in a couple of days, we’ll have her service and move on from there. Things will be easier because we have each other.”

“That’s right. And tonight when I get home, if you’d like, I’d like for you to make love to me. I want to feel you deep inside of me. I want you to make me feel whole again. I want you to take me to heights that I’ve never been before.” He said that he wanted the same thing. “Good. I’m leaving here in a few minutes. There is nothing more that I can do for Beth, and that’s the way it should be.”

She didn’t get out of the hospital right away. She did wait for the funeral home to have them remember that it was only going to be a graveside service. They said that they remembered and everything would be ready for her in two days. Nodding and thanking them for their help, she made her way to the nurses’ desk to thank them.

“You guys went above and beyond anything that could have happened for us, and I’m happy to say that you all did me a good deed in helping me cope with her daily.” They said that it had been their pleasure. “Thank you again. I’m going home now and will sleep until I wake up. That might be a while from now, but I deserve it.”

After leaving the hospital, she had to pull over once and cry. It just hit her that she’d not have to go to the hospital again to visit her sister. That Beth was truly gone, and that her sister Helen was gone as well. It hurt her to her core to know that she was now the only child left from the Jamestown family. She wished then that her parents would have been there to help her, but they were at peace as well. Putting the car into drive, she made her way to the house that she’d been sharing with Sherman and decided that things were going to be better for her from now on.

Exhausted when she got home, she nearly didn’t make it up the stairs. It was as if she’d had all her energy taken from her the moment that she’d walked in the door. Glad that Sherman had been there when she’d collapsed, he carried her up to the bedroom and laid her gently on the bed. Smiling at him, she told him how much she loved him.

“You rest now. We have the rest of our lives to make love, but you need your sleep.” She said that she was all right and yawned to show just how much she wasn’t. “You’re weak with exhaustion, Serenity. Even I can tell that much.”

“But I want to start my new life with you.” He said that they were doing just that as he was going to sleep with her. “Oh, please do. I would love to have you lying next to me when I wake.”

“If you wake up in the morning, I’ll be there for you.” He laughed a little, and she didn’t understand. If she was honest with herself, she was beginning to shut down herself. She really was tired. “You sleep until you wake up refreshed. Everything that you had going on now is over, and you need your rest.”

“I really do.” He took off his shirt and tossed it to the floor. Rolling to her side, she missed the rest of him being undressed but could hear the sounds of things hitting the floor. Sitting up to strip off her clothing, she got to her bra and panties and was finished. If she was going to put on a night gown, it was too late. Lying down, she was out before her head hit the pillow.

Sherman was laughing again when he moved her to the bed the right way. Her legs had been dangling off the side of the bed, and her arms were up under her. As soon as she was put right in the bed, he kissed her on the mouth and told her that he loved her. Before she could say anything back to him, the covers were over her, and she felt like she’d been wrapped up in sunshine and warmth. Serenity didn’t know if she’d move after that and closed her eyes. Sleep wasn’t far off in coming to her, and she smiled. She was home. And she was happy.

~*~

Sherman had hated to wake up Serenity, but was glad that she looked so much better. The graveside service was this morning, and he knew she’d never forgive him if he let her sleep past the time it was. He was glad that she looked better than she had three nights ago. Not only did she look rested, but she looked happy as well.

“I should have given myself a week.” Yawning, he yawned with her and smiled. “It looks like both of us could have used a bit more sleep. I know that I could.”

“You’ve slept around the clock for three days. I think you needed to get up and refresh yourself. If you’re still tired after today, I’ll let you go back to sleep and not wake you at all. How about that?” She kissed him for an answer. “By the way, there will be flowers and planters at the graveside for us to take home. Or whatever you wanted to do with them. There are quite a few of them, I was told.”

“Who are they from?” He told her the few names that he’d been able to remember. “I guess I never thought of people knowing you guys would send flowers. She was your sister-in-law, wasn’t she?”

“Yes. No matter what went on at the hospital, people would find out that she died and send flowers and arrangements. I’m just glad that the funeral director gave me a heads-up. He said that there are about a hundred and fifty arrangements.” She asked what he’d do with that many. “I’d sent them to the hospital so that they can put them in rooms with people who don’t have anything or anyone visiting them. That way, someone will get some use out of them. I’ll have him save the cards, however.”

“That’s an excellent idea.” Sherman told her that he’d seen that done another time when there had been too many flowers. “I guess I should take the cards and write thank-you notes. I’m so glad that you reminded me. That’s a great deal of flowers for someone who wasn’t well known around here.”

“Yes, I was surprised too. He said that he’d do what you wanted and that would be on you for the cards. I guess they have the book too of the list of people that will be here today. I don’t know how many will show up, but I know that all the Savages will be there.” She thought that was nice of them. “They’re your family too and would like to be there to support you. I know that they’d been planning it for a while now.”

“I think it’s great.” They decided to ride over in the limo as parking would be at a premium. As soon as they arrived, the funeral director said that he had brought only the flowers that had been cut to the service and that they would take care of the planters as soon as they got back. Serenity seemed pleased with the outcome and told the man that. “I’ll make sure people know what an amazing job you’ve done here. You saved me a lot of time as well.”

“It’s not often we have two deaths from the same family within a few weeks of one another. This way, there will be something for the elderly people at the hospital and nursing homes. Everyone makes out well.” She hugged the elderly man and told him that he’d been so nice to her that she’d never realized it all. “I hope that it’s a long time in coming, but if you need our services again, you know that we’ll be here for you.”

After the service, where about fifty people showed up, she was glad to have this taken care of. She’d not known about it until after the service, but Tucker and Kaida had catered a meal for anyone who wanted to stop by the house and give their condolences to Serenity. She couldn’t believe how many people showed up and was glad that they only had nice things to say to her. None of them knew Beth, but they said that they were happy that she and Sherman had become engaged and were happy for them. After everyone left, she sat down on the couch and looked around the room. That was when Skye and Raven came to sit with her.