Page 156 of Unravel Me

It’s obvious that he’s reluctant to talk about this, but eventually he admits,

"You know, I avoid sparring with him whenever I can. I usually train with his brothers and cousins. We don’t exactly chat. He’s a sick bastard."

"With his brothers… you mean including Mauro?"

He nods, and I feel a little exhilarated because here is someone who might be able to give me information from an unexpected, unbiased source.

"What’s Mauro like?" I whisper, biting my lips to the point of pain.

"Good guy. Nothing like Rocco."

"Good? I wouldn’t say that answer really clears much up—" I start, but at that moment, the doorbell rings.

"That’s Eric with my band," Bay says, heading toward the door.

"Would you mind if I hide out in Tommy’s room? I’m not ready to meet a bunch of new people. I have too much on my mind."

Bay merely shrugs, so I quickly slip into Tommy’s room.

I hear their voices and footsteps, but fortunately they don’t wake my son. I lie down on the little sofa in the corner.

My thoughts are all over the place, so I decide to take a nap for a while. I feel unbelievably exhausted, as if something is missing inside me, sucking away my energy, leaving behind nothing but a void.

I close my eyes and toss and turn for a long time, unable to fall asleep, while Mauro’s face appears before my eyes, the way I saw him last night. Clouded somehow, desperate, angry and hungry, yet at the same time filled with some kind of deep pain.

I remember his touch, the way his arms encircled me, filled with such thirst. That vision sets me on fire, and the longing for his closeness almost twists my guts.

My fingers instinctively reach for the pendant around my neck and clench around its golden surface.

The halves are connected. As if symbolically representing our souls. Joined. We lived apart for years, each with one half, but that’s in the past now. The pendant is whole again.

What about us?

I can’t stand this separation. I don’t want to stay away from him! Good Fate, what do I do? What do I do?

Finally, I doze off, then wake again. At one point, I get the impression that Bay leaves because the door clicks shut behind him. The band must be gone too, and I’m left alone with Tommy, who is still sleeping.

So I go back to dozing.

Eventually, Tommy wakes up. He sits up in bed and calls, "Dada, Dada…"

I immediately spring up and go to him, picking him up.

His little body is warm and slightly sweaty, his damp curls stuck to his forehead.

I brush them back, looking into his eyes.

At some point, I notice that he’s reaching out his hands toward me and grabbing my ear.

"Il… il…"

"Ear?"

I realize that he’s fascinated by the strange change in me. I slept with my hair all mussed up, and part of my ear is sticking out.

"Yes," I say, feeling a bit strange. "Daddy has now… he has special ears, funny ears like this."

Tommy raises both hands and grabs his own ears, pulling on them, little sparks in his eyes. "Tommy, Tommy!" he calls, bouncing a little in a seated position.