Page 39 of On Your Knees

“Good boy,” he says and pets my hair with his clean hand.

My hands are clean because I never touched anything. The mess is all between my legs, and it’s staying there. Ethan wants it there.

After washing his hands and getting rid of the apron, Ethan leads me around the island to a chair, helping me up then leaving me there while he starts pouring coffee.

He makes mine just like I make it. When he brings it to me, I say, “You were watching me. This morning.”

“Yes.”

“And last night,” I add.

“Did you like the picture?”

“It didn’t look like me.”

He frowns. “What do you mean?”

“It was beautiful.”

“Because you are beautiful. I told you that I would show you to yourself. That’s what you are. What did you do with it?”

“I hid it. Under the mattress.”

His frown deepens. “Why?”

“I’m not sure. I’m sorry.”

“You don’t need to be sorry.” He pets my hair again. “Drink your coffee.”

I sit there in a mess of cum, drinking coffee while Ethan goes back to working on the food. I watch him as he cooks the eggs and toasts the bread. This is the best day of my life.

Ethan looks over at me, but I don’t look away. I meet his dark, intense gaze. I take it into myself.

When the food is ready, Ethan sets a plate in front of me. I stare at it, mouth watering, unable to comprehend something so amazing. He made this for me.

“Eat,” he says as he comes to sit beside me with his own plate.

I start with the toast, closing my eyes as I bite into the thick, tangy sourdough. When Ethan’s hand settles on my thigh, I realize that I’m moaning. I cut myself off and look at him, but I find him watching me with a strange expression. There’s heat in it, but there’s a softness I’ve never seen in him.

I have felt it though. I felt it this morning when he carried me into the shower. He took care of me. He’s taking care of me now too.

I eat my toast and the eggs. I eat everything. I’m drinking another cup of coffee when Ethan’s phone buzzes. He snags it from the counter. He scowls as he reads whatever message he just received. He stares at it for a long time. Then his eyes slide to me. They’ve gone cold, almost suspicious. Goosebumps form all over my body.

Ethan blinks and the suspicion clears, but I’m still chilled, and I’m aware of myself again, like I’ve suddenly woken up from the dream I’ve been in. I realize, quite abruptly, that I’m naked and dirty. I’m gross.

Ethan sets his phone down without responding to the message. He gets up and starts cleaning up the kitchen. I should help, but the mess between my legs keeps me where I am.

Ethan notices. He comes back to me and takes hold of my hair, pulling my head back.

He speaks in my ear in a soft but angry voice. “What’s going on? You’re upset.”

I just pant. I don’t know how to respond. I’m both thrilled and terrified that he noticed.

He pinches my right nipple hard enough to make me yelp. “Answer me, Levi.”

“I don’t know.”

He pinches my left nipple, eliciting another cry. “I don’t believe you.”