Page 82 of The Way We Are Now

‘Only when they’ve done what they’ve done to women.’

‘Any man, to be fair, Anna…’ When Gemma saw I was glaring at her, she shut up but then went on, ‘So, had you invited him?’

‘Of course I hadn’t,’ I snapped.

‘Well, it’s all the thing now, isn’t it?’

‘What is?’

‘Exes being invited to weddings and so on. I bet anything when you and Michael get round to it – now that he’s finally proposed – he’ll have his ex-wife there. As well as all her brood.’

‘Can we not talk about this?’ I said crossly, turning to my diary.

‘Which bit? Your impending nuptials, or the love of your life turning up after almost twenty years?’

‘Neither,’ I snapped again, reaching for my phone and then, when Gemma, knowing herself dismissed, gave me one of her looks and started walking back to her office, I said, ‘Oh, Gemma, come back. I’m sorry. What am I going to do?’

‘What do you want to do?’

‘I want to see him,’ I breathed. ‘I need to see him. Does that make me a bad person?’

‘A bad person? What the hell are you talking about?’ Gemma frowned. ‘Just tell Michael you’re seeing an old friend from university days… hang on, have you ever told him about Theo Mandeville?’

I shook my head. ‘He’d have thought it hilarious. Me, a poor Jewish miner’s daughter from Rothersley in love with the lord of the manor? It’s pure Mills and Boon.’

‘Catherine Cookson, at least.’ She nodded sagely and then paused. ‘But did he treat you like an inferior? Did he lord it over you? If that’s the case, tell him to fuck off.’

I shook my head. ‘Never. No, never. It was probably always me who did the teasing.’

‘The teasing?’

‘All right, goading,’ I admitted. ‘Said his lot’ – I air-quoted the words – ‘were parasites, with all their acres of land, living off the backs of the workers.’

‘Jesus, you didn’t!’ Gemma was shocked. ‘No wonder he did a runner and married one of his own kind!’

‘Honor Double-Barrel?’

‘Oh, you’ve done your research, as well, I see.’ Gemma gave a little crow of laughter. ‘Not just nosy old me.’

‘Ask Jeeves, Wikipedia,’ I said shortly. ‘The marvels of the internet.’

‘Anna,’ Gemma said gently, ‘you need to see him. Make your peace with him. Put him to bed.’

‘What? Take him to bed?’ My head came up at that.

‘Turn of phrase, you daft mare. He’s probably one of the reasons you’ve not actually said yes to Michael yet.’

‘How do you know I’ve not actually said yes?’

‘He poured his heart out to Callum and me at the do. He congratulated us about the baby. Said he wants babies.’

‘Oh, not me then?’

‘I think he’d like it to be you who’s there at the birth,’ Gemma said dryly.

‘And presumably at the conception,’ I added and we both started chortling.

‘You’ve got Lord Theo’s number. Go and see him. Make your peace with him, then marry Michael and have lots of bouncing babies. Hell,’ she added, ‘I need someone to compare piles and varicose veins with.’