Page 201 of That Rush

I meet his gaze. “I can picture you.”

Aiden’s hands loosen on the couch.

“I can picture marrying you. I can picture waking up beside you years from now and knowing I chose the right man.”

The tension drains from his shoulders so quickly it hurts to watch.

“But I need to recognize myself inside that life.”

His fingers close again. “What does that mean?”

“My work stays mine. I get time alone. I decide if and when this house becomes my home.”

“Then keep the cabin.”

The answer comes too fast. The lamp throws his shadow toward the stairs, stretching it up toward the empty spaces he made for me.

I shake my head slightly. “That sounds reasonable now, but tonight you answered for me about Thanksgiving. Josie thinks I’m moving in. You’re building a room for me, and you never asked what I wanted it to be.”

“I was trying to give you space.”

“You gave me the space you thought I should want.”

The house goes quiet. No Josie turning pages upstairs. No small feet crossing the hall. Only the old clock on the mantel marks the passing seconds.

His gaze hardens. “Your version of a future includes a plan for surviving without me.”

I know what he hears. I can’t lie to make it hurt less.

“Yes.”

Aiden looks away.

“That doesn’t mean losing you wouldn’t destroy me. I would miss you and Josie every day. I need to know I’d still be a person afterward.”

“You’re already planning for the end.”

“I’m trying not to disappear inside us.”

He turns back. “That sounds like you need proof you can take me or leave me.”

“I choose you every day.”

“Until you don’t.”

His voice cracks on the final word.

My body moves before I can think. I make it around the edge of the couch, one step toward him, then stop. Touching him now would be a promise—an answer I’m not giving. Aiden watches me stop, and pain pulls his mouth tight.

Neither of us speaks.

My voice drops. “Anyone can leave. Marriage can end—a shared address doesn’t take that risk away.”

“I know that better than most.”

“I know.”

“Then why can’t you understand why I need more than another Friday?”