Page 212 of That Rush

“I miss his terrible opinions about coffee and the face he makes when I read him a filthy paragraph he wasn’t prepared for. I miss watching him try not to laugh when I’m being unreasonable for sport. I miss the way he listens, even when he thinks he already knows the answer.”

A reluctant smile pulls at my mouth.

I miss Josie taking over my hammock and giving Sprinkle dialogue. “I miss our Fridays, breakfast at the ranch, and the feeling of having two people in my day who are genuinely happy when I show up.”

Sadie’s eyes soften.

“And the sex.” I take a breath. “I miss that an alarming amount.”

Rowan leans back in her chair, a smile touching her lips. “There she is.”

“I’m heartbroken, not dead.”

“Important distinction.”

The humor eases some of the pressure in my throat. I look toward the counter where Josie’s drawing waits to go home.

“They made room in my life without asking me to perform for it. The problem started when Aiden decided making room for me meant deciding where I belonged.”

Sadie nods once. “What do you want?”

“I want him. I want Josie. I want Fridays and sex and our books migrating between both houses. I want a commitment we define together. I also need time alone, work that remains mine, and decisions about my future that include me.”

Neither of them tells me to call him.

They do not offer to explain me to him or report whether he is suffering enough. Rowan opens her laptop again. Sadie finishes her coffee and returns to the counter when the bell over the door rings.

Their restraint leaves the decision where it belongs.

I drafted a message last night. I could send it now and offer Aiden every truth I was too angry to name during the breakup. That would ask me to cross the distance he created without knowing whether he understands what went wrong.

I can love him and still wait for him to show me he understands.

If Aiden offers a future we can build together, I will listen.

Chapter 31

Aiden

Thursday morning, twelve days after Paige left, the finish carpenter studies the revised measurements spread across the folding table and looks around the office as though the walls might explain why I changed half the plan overnight.

“You’re sure about this?”

“Yes.”

“The shelves beneath the window went in yesterday.”

“They need to come out again.”

He gives me a long look. “Good thing you’re paying by the hour.”

“I assumed you’d find a benefit eventually.”

I carry the drill to the window and remove the first screw myself. Three low shelves run beneath the glass. I’d measured one specifically for Josie, low enough for her to reach her own books.

That was the problem. I designed the room around everyone Paige might accommodate instead of the quiet she wanted.

The carpenter taps the new drawing. “Window seat here. Shelves to the ceiling on both walls. Fireplace in that corner.”