Page 36 of I’m Already Gone

He looks uncomfortable as hell. His posture is rigid, shoulders drawing in as if he’s trying to decide if he made a mistake stepping foot into my shop.

“Yeah…I... I wanted to check in on you,” he finally responds. “How have you been?”

“I’m fine, Ethan.”

He nods. “Good, good. That’s good.”

A ghost of a smile touches my lips at his obvious nervousness.

“Can I get you anything?” I ask him, trying to break the awkwardness between us.

He stares at me for a long, agonizing minute. I can’t breathe. He’s looking at me the way he used to, with a deep, searching gaze that can see right through my defenses.

“Can I have a four-pack of chocolate chip cookies?” he asks, his voice a little rougher.

I swallow back the urge to cry. When I first opened the shop, he used to swing by during his breaks to order exactly four chocolate chip cookies.

“Sure,” I rasp, not letting my emotions take over.

I slip on a pair of gloves and grab a vibrant purple treat box. Sliding the display case to the side, I reach in and retrieve the cookies, placing them inside. Sealing the box, I feel a twinge of sadness with each fold of the tab.

Walking over to the cash register, I ring up the total. “That will be $7.80.”

He pulls a ten-dollar bill from his wallet and hands it to me, his fingers brushing mine briefly. The contact sends a jolt through me, a fleeting spark of what once was. After completing the transaction, I pass him the box and his change.

“Anything else?” I ask.

He takes the box, offering me a smile that doesn't quite reach his eyes. “No, that’s all. It’s been a while since I had your cookies, and I realized how much I missed them,” he says, his words hanging in the air like an olive branch.

How do I respond to that? What does it even mean? I go with something simple, trying not to read too much into what this is. “Yes, it has been.”

He nods. “Thanks for this.” He raises the box slightly before turning toward the door.

As I start to retreat back to the kitchen, his voice stops me. “It’s good to see you, Lily, and I’m glad you’re feeling better.”

My heart splinters inside my chest. I wasn’t prepared for this day to come. To hear him speak to me with compassion and kindness, the way he used to, before he betrayed me.

I slowly turn to face him. “It’s good to see you too, Ethan.”

My words seem to hit a chord because he closes his eyes for a brief moment

He exits the shop without another word, and I let out a shaky breath. The tension that had kept me upright disappears, and my knees buckle. Unable to hold myself up any longer, I sink to the floor, the weight of the moment pressing down on me.

As soon as I pull up to my driveway, my phone rings. When I look at the screen, I see it’s Erica, Ethan’s mother. She’s probably calling to see the kids, but she can work it out with Ethan on one of his weekends.

I decline the call and walk to the door more sluggishly than usual.

The first thing I hear as I enter the house is Sam laughing with the kids. I lean against the wall and watch Ollie jump up and down excitedly as they play the game Charades.

“Mom!” Maddy is the first to see me, and she jumps over the couch, almost smacking Jake on the back of the head.

“Careful,” I laugh as she wraps her arms around my waist. I can feel my strength weakening as I hold her close to me.

“How was your day?” I whisper against her hair, taking in her vanilla scent.

“Good.” She rests her head on my chest.

Her grin turns to a frown. “Are you okay, Mom?” she asks quietly.