Page 28 of Bumpy, the Gargoyle Slayer

She smirks. “Sent him packing, didn’t I? And he never even saw me coming. Confused all this,” she adds, gesturing to her pretty face and beautiful curves, “with girlie.”

“You are girlie. You’re just strong, too.”

“Yeah.” A long sigh escapes her. “I still wish…” She sends a furtive glance my way, and then says, “Never mind.”

Bumping her shoulder with mine, I say, “No. Tell me. Please. I want to know.”

For a moment, she bites her lip, but then nods, as if coming to a decision. “It’s just that I’m so tired of trying to be my destiny. I don’t mind saving people and ridding the world of the bad monsters. I like it, even. I just want to do something else, too, you know?”

“Like?”

She shrugs. “I haven’t figured that out yet. I just don’t want my destiny to be the most important thing about me, I guess.”

A ragged grunt escapes me. “Tell me about it.”

“You, too?”

I nod. “Lately, it feels as if I’ve outgrown my purpose, or maybe that it’s somehow escaped from me. I was so good at guarding the holy site, but then there was the fire and I was left hanging out in the world, and recently…” Because of her, which I don’t say. “…I realized that I wasn’t who I used to be anymore. My time away from my destiny has… changed me.”

She’s quiet a moment before she says in a small voice, “But what will you do about it?”

“I don’t know,” I admit.

“Could you say no to the cathedral?”

Thrilling thought. Terrifying thought. “I don’t…” But maybe… could I make a new destiny? A new way to fulfill my calling? “I wish I could.”

The heresy of my words raises wild panic inside me, but also a kind of unanticipated acceptance. I’m different from the gargoyle I was before the fire. I’ve known it for a while, though it took Bunny to make the realization stick. I don’t think I’m capable of sitting around for decades at a stretch, waiting for evil to strike. I’m used to active combat now, used to living in the world with all its glories and miseries.

And… if I’m not a cathedral guardian anymore, if I’m no longer suited, then why can’t I be with Bunny? Sure, we won’t be able to mate. And yes, I’m far too old for her. But when she looks at me like she’s looking at me now, does any of that matter?

I can take care of her. I can nurture her soul, and love her body, and…

But she’s standing up and brushing down her corduroy pants that fit her like second skin. They match the suede jacket she wears, both in shades of autumn leaves. “I wish I could, too.”

Once we begin walking, I ask again, “What would you be if not a slayer?”

“Something creative. I miss the rush of acting, though maybe I’m not as good as I think I am.”

“You’ve played an admirable girlfriend these past three weeks.”

“That doesn’t count. It’s easy to pretend to be in love with you because I a…” Her lips smack closed as her eyes widen.

But it’s too late. I heard her. I swing her around to study her face, looking past the tomato color to find the truth. “Bumps, are you saying…?”

Her lips part. Her breath is heavy on the cool air.

And not a part of me can resist.

I lean down and capture her mouth with mine. My first kiss… and I’m lost. She’s holy fire, the kind that can burn me back to nothing. She’s a prayer I never thought to pray, and a chorus no earthly being has ever heard, and I’m so gone, there’s no way back to before.

When she pulls back, she touches her lips. “You—you kissed me. You said you wouldn’t.”

“I know.” But I’m lying. I know nothing except that my entire being has been crumpled up like a soggy ball of socks. I want to cry tears that I’ve never shed, and scream with an insufferable pain I’ve never felt, because she looks shocked and destroyed, when she should look like I set her on the moon. “You kissed me back.”

She nods, but then her face crumples. “I know. It’s just… I’m a slayer. I can’t be with a gargoyle. And you’re going back to your duties, and I… damn it, this hurts.” She covers her heart with her hand.

I don’t think. I just draw her into me so I can hug away the pain. I’m not sure if I want to rid hers or mine. Both, I guess. “Sshh. It’s okay. Our relationship will work itself out.”