Page 113 of Seale the Deal

The entire walk up front, I feel sick. Lost in my thoughts, I forgot to put the dress down, and it’s draped over my arm. It feels like I’m carrying around physical evidence of my crime, which maybe won’t be a crime now?

It’s all getting so complicated.

How can I continue to accept these incredible gestures while actively lying? First, it was excitement from the town. Then it was flowers. Now it’s a dress that needs a happily ever after. Each act of kindness piles on my conscience, and it’s impossible to ignore how big this is getting.

Just as we reach the till, Remi comes into the shop.

Oh God, Wren. Are you that sick? she asks as she walks toward me.

No, it’s just… I run my hands over the fabric of the dress. Beryl’s giving me her wedding dress. Well… we’ll alter it.

I try to convey with my eyes, What the hell do we do? We can’t let this sweet woman ruin her own wedding dress for me, but Remi just perks up.

Oh cool! What are you thinking?

Beryl jumps in, pulling at the layers of organza. We’ll remove this awful material. The silk underneath is gorgeous. Then we can add some lace accents.

Remi gasps. Oh! We saw a dress Wrenley loved, with a low cut and some see-through fabric holding the chest part together.

Mesh, dear. We could do that. Beryl says. We could maybe use the lace as the mesh.

The women chatter excitedly, dissecting my dress like it’s crafts class. My chest tightens. How can Remi just stand here and plan my life like it’s nothing?

I need to get out of here! I blurt. Both women look at me, startled.

Just a… headache. Booze and all, I lie.

Okay, Beryl says. I’m just going to finish with Remi, then I really need to go.

I hug Beryl. Thank you for the dress.

Anything you need, child. You just tell me.

I stumble outside and lean against the building as nausea roils through me. I pull my hair back as my stomach knots, but luckily, nothing comes out.

Remi appears beside me. Are you okay?

No. I’m upset.

Why?

How can she not understand?

Beryl is giving me her wedding dress, Remi! The words burst out of me before I can stop them. She wants it to have a happily ever after, and I can’t give it that.

The feeling of being stuck between two realities bubbles to the surface again. I could let this dress finish its story like Beryl wants, but is it what I want?

Remi studies me for a long moment before reaching out and touching my arm. Hey. Her voice is gentle. Come on, this doesn’t have to be so deep.

It does, I say. She’s giving me something so precious based on a version of myself we created.

That’s not true, Remi says. She’s giving it to you because she cares about you.

She shouldn’t.

Remi scoffs. And why not?

I shake my head because I’m getting sick of repeating myself. I keep saying that everything this town is doing is too much, and yet saying it isn’t stopping it. And I know the only thing that will is telling the truth.