Page 64 of The Only Way Is Up

‘Is everything OK?’ Daisy put her hand on Melanie’s arm, stopping her so she could look closely at her puffy face and wildly dishevelled hair. She really did look dreadful, as if she hadn’t slept in days.

Melanie started to laugh and this time Daisy could see the genuine joy in her expression. ‘We were having sex, Daisy,’ she announced happily. ‘Gerald pretty much chased me up the stairs the second Will left to visit his cousins in Bath yesterday.’

Daisy’s mouth fell open, her eyes boggling. Melanie laughed even harder.

‘Will’s back later this afternoon. When you rang the doorbell I was over Gerald’s desk in heels and some skimpy knickers that haven’t seen the light of day in a decade. We ignored you for a while, but you kept ringing!’

Melanie’s shoulders shook as Daisy clamped her hand over her mouth, in turn delighted at this revelation, and relieved that Melanie wasn’t being kept hostage in the attic.

‘Oh God, I’m so sorry!’ said Daisy. ‘What the hell happened to Gerald while we were away?’

Melanie smiled. ‘Tom. Tom happened.’

CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR

Justin wasn’t much of a morning person, so he and Tom had agreed early on in the sustainable year project that Tom would let the chickens out and collect the eggs. He often combined it with Henry’s first walk of the day, but Tom usually brought Henry down to the allotment at lunchtime too, just to get some fresh air before classes began for the afternoon. He kept up the routine even in the school holidays, because right now routine was the only thing that got him out of bed in the morning.

He watched the chickens first, counting the sixteen laying hens and nine cocks that Justin kept for meat, although their numbers had rapidly dwindled due to Justin’s largely chicken-based diet. He knew he should be in his office preparing for parents’ evening, but instead he headed over to Nancy’s goat enclosure and offloaded his woes. Despite not having much to say beyond the odd bleat, she was a good listener.

‘—Anyway I’ve given up,’ Tom murmured, in summary, leaning on the fence as Nancy observed him intently, her head tilted to one side. ‘I’m done with women. They either die unexpectedly or lie to you.’

‘About fucking time,’ yelled Justin, bringing his bike to a skidding halt and making Tom jump. ‘I’ve been trying to convince you to turn your back on women for months. A man like you is entirely wasted on them.’

Tom shook his head and lifted the flaps to collect this morning’s eggs. ‘Fourteen today. How many do you want?’ Justin took whatever eggs he needed each day and Tom took the rest.

‘I’ll have them all today,’ Justin announced. ‘I’m making goat’s milk custard for dinner this evening, and I’ll hard boil the rest for scotch eggs.’

‘Anything else I can do while I’m here?’ Tom asked, stacking the boxed eggs in Justin’s wicker bicycle basket.

‘You can either kill two chickens or pull some veg,’ Justin replied, always keen for free labour. ‘Enough to roast for five.’

‘I’ll do the veg,’ said Tom hurriedly. There were still some leafy greens and root veg left in the soil, covered with a bed of straw to protect them from frost, and some onions and potatoes keeping dry in the shed.

‘Fine by me,’ said Justin glumly. ‘These days it’s the only chance I get to yank on a cock that isn’t my own.’

‘It’s fine, I’m getting enough for both of you,’ said Marcus jogging up behind them from the direction of the lake. Tom and Justin rolled their eyes at each other as he bounced around on the spot, wearing black running leggings and a hoodie that said ‘new balls please’ in neon yellow lettering.

‘Going well with Gloria then?’ Tom asked mildly.

‘Very much so,’ Marcus preened. ‘If she’s not riding my dick, she’s sending me dirty pictures.’

‘Make sure she doesn’t accidentally put them on the tennis club Facebook page,’ Justin chortled. ‘What are you doing over here anyway?’

‘Just out for a run, so I thought I’d swing by for a gloat.’ Both men groaned. Marcus looked too smug for words. ‘I’ve had a message from Daisy; she’s requested my services on the tennis court.’

‘Has she specifically requested you show her your winning smash – or is it just tennis for now?’ asked Justin wryly. Tom said nothing, noting his throat felt dry and his hands were clammy.

Marcus rolled his eyes. ‘Tennis, obviously. But it’s one-on-one time, so an opportunity for me to have another go at working my special Marcus Elliot magic.’ He kept bouncing, a bundle of hormones and nervous energy, until his phone buzzed and he fished it out of his pocket.

‘She cancelled on you already?’ Justin sneered as Marcus tapped the screen, his brow furrowed.

‘Oh, fucking bollocks,’ muttered Marcus. ‘It’s worse than that. She wants to play mixed doubles with you, me and Melanie.’

Tom grinned and disappeared into the shed as Justin dissolved into howls of laughter.

CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE

Squeezing five people and two dogs into Beech Cottage was definitely a challenge, but they managed it somehow. Daisy and Tom stayed in the lounge, sitting either side of the wood burner with a dog each. Justin and Stella were in the kitchen, clattering pots and dishes and cackling at each other, while Will hovered in the doorway between the two rooms shooting videos on his phone.