Page 32 of My Veteran Biker

"Knox."

"What?"

"I'm forty years old and fat and I haven't been part of anything like this in my entire life. What if I say the wrong thing? What if I don't fit?"

I reach over and take her hand, lacing our fingers together. Her palm is damp with sweat.

"Sydney will introduce you around," I say. "She's Clint's woman. She knows how overwhelming this is, she'll make it easier."

"What's she like?"

"Smart. Direct. You'll get along."

"That's not helpful."

"What do you want me to say?"

"I don't know. Something that makes me less terrified."

We're on Old Mill Road now, heading east. The clubhouse is only a few miles ahead and I can feel her tension ratcheting up with every mile.

"There's a seven-year-old there," I say. "Clint's daughter. Ava. If a seven-year-old can handle this, you can."

"A seven-year-old doesn't know what any of this means."

"Neither did Sydney when she met Clint. Neither did any of the women. You're not the first person to walk into this scared."

She's quiet for a moment. Then, "Is Sienna there? Crane's daughter?"

"Probably."

"What's that like? Being with her when her father's trying to kill you?"

"Diesel loves her. That's all that matters."

Francis looks down at our joined hands. "This is the life. This is what I'm choosing."

"Yeah."

"People get hurt. People die."

"Yeah."

"And you're asking me to be okay with that."

"I'm not asking you to be okay with it. I'm asking you to accept it. There's a difference."

We turn onto the gravel road and the clubhouse comes into view. Security lights are on even though it's still daylight. Brothers standing on the perimeter, watching.

Francis sees them and her hand tightens on mine.

"Last chance to change your mind," I say.

"I'm not changing my mind."

"You're allowed to be scared."

"I am scared. I'm doing it anyway."