Page 50 of Fake It For Glory

“Harsh,” she said, laughing.

“You know what I mean. I would want to be a good boyfriend, but I don’t think I would be. My time is spent working on the AI tech. I live and breathe it.”

“I’m sure a girlfriend would understand if you were busy at work,” she said. “A good woman is supposed to support you.”

“Maybe,” I said. “Maybe that’s just what I tell myself. It’s easy to say I’m too busy.” I paused, choosing my words carefully. “Truth be told? I don’t really like people. I don’t know how to talk to them. I get bored and my mind drifts and then I look like I’m ignoring them. I suppose I am. My mind is always thinking about my tech or what I could do other than listen to a bunch of shit I couldn’t care less about.”

Merida laughed at my admission. It felt good to be able to share my inner thoughts. “I guess I can understand that, but human connection is important. I’m sure you like some people.”

“Most people tend to rub me the wrong way, get under my skin. They always want something from me, or they want me to fit into this idea of who they think I should be.”

Her silence hung in the air for a moment, and I couldn’t help but wonder if my honesty had made her uncomfortable. I didn’t mean to complain. I knew I had no right to complain. I was very fortunate. I had everything I could possibly want. Bitching about being wealthy and wanted wasn’t exactly endearing.

“I guess that would be hard,” she said after a long pause.

“It’s just made it really difficult to trust anyone,” I tried to explain. “I have very few people in my life I feel like I can be myself with. I guess what I’m trying to say is thank you. Thanks for being a normal person.”

Once again, she went completely silent. I hoped she didn’t think I was pouring my heart out and asking for anything. I sounded like a sap. Sex one time did not make a relationship. I was paying her to be my girlfriend.

I was about to tell her to forget I said anything when she pulled away from me. She sat up and looked over her shoulder at me.

“Maybe you should go.” Her voice was so soft, I almost didn’t hear her.

“You want me to go?” I asked. I was pretty sure she asked me to stay, which was why I had sent my driver away.

“I think that would be for the best,” she said. I watched her pull a blanket from the end of the bed and wrap it around herself.

Suddenly, she was very modest. It made me ashamed to be naked in her presence. I hopped out of her bed and scrambled to find my clothes. I sent the driver a quick text, hoping he wasn’t home for the night. Fortunately for me, he was down the road eating a very early breakfast. He promised to be back in a few to pick me up.

“Is everything okay?” I asked her.

“Fine,” she said, smiling.

She followed behind me as I walked to the door.

“I’ll see you tomorrow,” I said.

She shook her head. “No, I can’t. I have to work this week. I’ll make sure I review the schedule. I will of course be at any events you need me to be at, but I don’t think there’s anything that requires my presence this week. I’ve got the wardrobe I need.”

It felt like I’d been slapped. “Of course,” I said, nodding once. “I’ll go. Goodnight.”

I stepped outside into the cold early morning. Mist blew in front of me as I rubbed my hands together.

“Goodnight, Jensen,” Merida said and closed the door behind me. I heard her throw the locks and knew I was officially dismissed. She didn’t even wait long enough to see if I had a ride.

I felt pretty damn used.

But as I walked down the steps of her townhouse, I couldn’t help but remember the way she had moaned my name only thirty minutes ago. She had been passionate, wild, and untamed. I wondered how someone who could make love like that could be so cold and dismissive of me afterward.

As I waited for my driver to arrive, I couldn’t help but question our arrangement. Was this a huge mistake? I didn’t think I was the type to fall head over heels in love, considering it hadn’t happened yet, but what if I did fall in love with her and she broke my heart?

My driver finally arrived and I got into the car, my thoughts still swirling around in my head. As we drove away from Merida’s townhouse, disappointment flooded me. I had been hoping for something more from her, something deeper than just a purely physical relationship. But it seemed like that was all she was interested in. That and the ridiculous amount of money I was going to pay her to pretend to like me.

As we drove through the city streets to the upper west side, I tried to focus on other things. But my mind kept going back to Merida and the way she had made me feel earlier that night. I couldn’t deny that there was a strong attraction between us, but was it enough to sustain a real relationship? Was she even interested in me like that?