Page 73 of Never Let Go

Cue all the blank stares I’d gotten as a result of my questions. Now, I knew that far more horrible things had happened to other people, but to me, that had been pretty bad. It’d been my first real taste of romantic disappointment. Of heartbreak, even.

I hadn’t even really been his friend. Why he’d asked for my help, I still didn’t know, and his explanation still didn’t make much sense. I was his only female friend? Bullshit. I wasn’t really his friend. We’d hung out a few times. That was it.

If I had been his friend for real, he’d never have bought that I hadn’t remembered him when he walked into my office. All of which was just confirmation that Foster O’Brien could not be trusted.

A fact that only got drilled home by my mother when she called later on. After hearing that I’d been crying, she pushed until I told the truth, and then went off on another rant about it.

“I told you this was going to happen, honey. You cannot trust a man when you can’t see his face while you’re speaking to him. It’s just not possible. If people are hiding in the dark, it’s for a reason.”

I sighed and she must’ve heard from my breathing that I was about to start crying again because she suddenly became soothing and reassuring. “I’m sorry this happened to you, baby, but it will all work out in the end. I promise. You will be stronger because of this, even if you don’t feel that way right now.”

I wasn’t so sure, but since I didn’t want to spend the rest of the night debating the issue, I just agreed until she finally hung up. Sitting with my phone in my hand, I wondered if Ashley might’ve had a point about letting him explain.

I had jumped to conclusions, but I also couldn’t call him and ask. I’d been humiliated enough as it was. At this point, the best thing I could do for my own self-preservation was to leave it—and him—alone.

Foster and I weren’t going to happen. Not as ourselves and not as Tyler and Amanda, and it was about time I accepted that.

35

FOSTER

“You tricked her?” Hope frowned at me after I’d finished sharing the highlights of the mistake I’d made back in college. “Foster! That’s a terrible thing to have done.”

“I didn’t mean to trick her,” I protested on a loud groan. “The truth is that I was sussing her out when I asked for her opinions on everything, but she didn’t seem to be interested at all. She got all shy, gave me an answer, and then she’d just walk away.”

“Because she was a college girl with a crush on the hot senior,” Hope said emphatically, her eyes wide as she shook her head back and forth. “Her getting all shy and walking away should’ve told you that she was interested.”

“How was I supposed to know that?” I shot back at her. “The girl wouldn’t even look me in the eyes, Hope. Eventually, I realized it was a lost cause and I asked a girl from my economics class instead.”

“To the date you planned for Shelby?”

I shrugged. “Well, I’d already bought everything. It seemed stupid to let it go to waste.”

Porter groaned. “Not because I’m sleeping with her, but I’m with Hope on this one. That was pretty mean of you, bro.”

“It wasn’t mean.” I scowled at them both. “Look, I really thought she wasn’t interested. The other day when she told me she’d had a crush on me was the first time I realized it may not have been quite as unreciprocated as I thought.”

Hope sighed loudly, like I was the most hopeless case she’d ever even heard of. “Why did you ask her to meet you there?”

“I was nervous,” I said. “That girl from my economics class was hot and I thought she might be the one who would get me over my feelings for Shelby. I wanted her to feel special, so I asked Shelby to come to make sure I hadn’t missed anything.”

I said those words out loud for the first time since I’d said them to her that night on the hill, and I winced. “Okay, you might be right. I might’ve been a bit of an asshole, but I didn’t mean to be. I was just…”

“Immature?” Hope said. “Blind? Selfish? Stupid?”

Porter’s hand shot out and he clamped it over her mouth. “Okay, he gets it. Now you’re the one who’s being mean.”

Hope wrenched his hand away and rolled her eyes at him. “But I wasn’t trying to be mean. By your logic, I’m off the hook then, right?”

I shook my head at her. “You’ve made your point. I get it. I owe her an apology for that, but it still doesn’t fix what happened last night.”

“No, it doesn’t.” Porter turned back to me with a thoughtful expression on his face. “Have you tried calling her to explain?”

“She told me to stay away from her and that she never wanted to see me again, so no. I haven’t tried calling her. I didn’t think it would be very well received if I did.”

“Well, it’s time to think again,” Hope said and then checked her watch. “Crap. You’ve got a meeting with Dan. Porter and I will be back when you’re done.”

I groaned. “Dan? What does he want?”