Page 60 of Hometown Hottie

29

NOVA

Doing nothing but lying in a hammock in the sunshine was pure and absolute bliss. I wasn’t reading. I just existed and I was pretty sure it was the closest I’d ever come to heaven. Sighing happily, I focused on the sensation of the sun warming my skin and the scents of earth, and motor oil, and gas from the boats on the lake that wafted through the air.

With Carson on my mind—and just across the lake—my body felt like it’d been suspended in a cocoon of relaxation. I closed my eyes. A smile ghosted across my lips as I remembered luring him to me in the lake yesterday, and I was pretty sure I was just about to fall into a slightly naughty dream about it when a weight suddenly jumped onto the hammock with me.

My eyes flew open just as Cassidy nestled in beside me, resting her head on my shoulder and turning it so her gaze was on mine. “I’m pretty sure Ryan was flirting with me yesterday.”

I blinked rapidly at the sudden change in direction of my thoughts. It took me a second to catch up, but when I did, I smiled at her. “Yeah, I noticed that too. You should go for it.”

“That was blunt,” she said, sounding mildly surprised. “Are you sure? I mean, he’s your brother. It could be weird for you if we got together.”

I chuckled. “Unlike Ryan, I’m fine with people doing whatever makes them happy as long as they’re honest with each other and clear about what they want. Besides, I think he’ll be way nicer to everyone if he just gets laid already.”

She swatted me, giggling, then shook her head and rolled onto her back. We lay in silence for a beat, both watching the clouds as they drifted by before she spoke again. “Are you ever going to seal the deal with Carson? Now that I finally know about you two, so many things make sense. He’s the guy you’ve been waiting for, isn’t he?”

“I haven’t been actively waiting for him,” I said slowly, trying to explain it in a way that would make sense even to myself. “I didn’t set out to wait for him, at least. It was just one kiss and a whole lot of chemistry back in the day. I would’ve been crazy to be stuck on him for ten years, waiting for him to come home when I never even knew he was planning on it.”

“But?” she said when I didn’t continue.

I sighed. “But I think I have been waiting to feel that way again. I’ve been waiting for a guy who makes me feel the way he used to, and no one ever did.”

“So what now?” she asked. “You weren’t waiting for him, but does he still make you feel that way?”

“Yes.” I winced as I admitted it for the first time out loud. “He really, really does. I don’t know how to explain it, but it’s true.”

She laughed. “You don’t have to explain it, babe. I get it. I’ve seen the way you two look at each other, like you’re both in pain and longing for something. It just didn’t make sense to me until I found out that you used to have something. Why didn’t you ever tell me about it?”

“There was nothing to tell,” I murmured. “I had a crush on him and he kissed me one whole time. That’s hardly the stuff to obsess over, so I felt silly about it. I also thought that it would pass and it did. I guess I just never forgot the way he made me feel, you know? I wasn’t hanging onto him so much as the idea of being capable of feeling that way, but now he’s back and it’s a mess. Again.”

“It wasn’t silly.” She reached for my hand and squeezed it. “The heart wants what it wants, Nova. If yours wants Carson and he wants you, then maybe it’s time you did something about it.”

“I want to,” I confessed, baring my soul about this for the first time ever. “I really, really want to, but it’s more than just giving in to the chemistry and lust. That’s what makes it so complicated. I like having him around too much. I like talking to him and laughing with him. I don’t just want to screw him. I want to be with him, but that’s crazy.”

“Why is it crazy?” she asked as a confused frown furrowed her brow. “He couldn’t keep his eyes off you last night, my friend. Somehow, I don’t think all he wants is to screw you, either. I think he wants the same things you do, and that could never be crazy.”

“Except for the Ryan of it all.”

She rolled her eyes. “Why would he be all that upset if you got together, even if it was just casual? You’re both grownups now. I’m pretty sure you’d both consent, so what does it have to do with Ryan at all?”

“It’s because I’m his little sister and Carson is his best friend. He sure seems to think that gives him the right to an opinion.”

“So? I’m your best friend and he’s your older brother, but that didn’t stop him. What’s good for the goose is good for the gander, hon. I’m pretty sure that makes you even, right?”

“You have a point, but I still don’t know. I think I’ve been too conditioned to think of him as off limits to really be able to see it objectively.”

“Objectively, you’re both completely single. You’re not related. Neither of you is in a position of authority in relation to the other, and legally, you’ve both been adults for a long time. There really is nothing standing in your way. If your brother has a problem with it, then he needs to grow the hell up.”

Music started playing inside again, filtering out to us. Jessie appeared on the deck in another bikini and carrying a tray of ice-cold mimosas. “It’s nearly noon, girls! That means we’re about three to four hours too late to be starting with these, so we’d better catch up.”

I laughed and went to join the others for a day next to the pool. All around us, people were doing the same thing we were, and a few hours later, it had turned into one big party. Our yard was covered in people in swimsuits and the music was blaring. Fires were lit as the afternoon wore on and the drinks kept flowing.

Tipsy and having the time of my life, I danced around with Harriet and Amber, not really sure where Cassidy and Jessie had disappeared to but not worried. The girls and I had spent most of the last couple hours in the pool, alternating between swimming, dancing, and working on our tans—all while sipping on delicious cocktails we whipped up ourselves.

“I need to get some water,” I shouted to my friends over the music, then left them on the deck and made my way through the throngs of people to the kitchen.

As I opened a bottle of water, Carson appeared, seemingly out of thin air and looking like a sweaty, tousled Greek god. He was shirtless again, a fresh glow on his skin saying that he’d spent the day in the sun just like I had. His dark hair was messy and windswept, and his eyes twinkled like gemstones in the low light of the kitchen as the sun started dipping low on the horizon outside.