Page 116 of Some Kinda Romance

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DASH

Istormed into my office, furious about the video and even more furious at myself for having forgotten about that interview. It’d happened so long ago that I hadn’t thought about it in years.

Plus, I was pretty sure I’d blocked it out because I hated talking to reporters. After any interviews, I had worked hard at forgetting that I’d ever done them to begin with. Ethan had to be responsible for unearthing this clip now, though.

That was the only explanation.

Breathing heavily, I tossed my phone down on my desk and covered my face in my hands, spinning to face the window. I released a frustrated roar into them. “Fuck!”

My muscles were so tense that it felt like my shirt might tear. My heart hammered and my breathing was erratic. Go figure that he’d dig that thing up now, just when everything was starting to go well between us.

The truth was that when I’d given that godforsaken interview, that really had been the way I’d felt. At the time, a new reality series was being released every five seconds and I couldn’t throw a stone in this fucking town without hitting some new star.

I’d felt that way for a long time. If I was being completely honest, I had still felt that way when I’d met Serenity, but obviously, my views on the subject had changed.

Hell, she’d changed me to the core of my very fucking being. I was even nice to reporters now. I smiled at them and everything, but I just wished she believed me.

I didn’t feel that way about her. What I thought years ago didn’t mean anything.

I was still breathing hard, my fingers clenched around the back of my head as I scowled out the window when Lance walked in. “You okay, bud?”

“No,” I said honestly.

He’d been the one who sent me the video this morning. Wanting to give me a heads-up that it was coming, he’d texted it to me just as I’d climbed into my car. Seconds after I’d said goodbye to Serenity. Seconds.

I’d missed being able to explain myself in person by seconds. Now, she was going to have at least the whole day to think, and after that last text of hers, it would probably be all night too. I doubted she was going to agree to see me today, and the longer she sat with this, the less likely she was to forgive me again.

“Serenity says she needs time,” I spat, so damn angry that I felt like I could catch snakes, strangle them, and then bring them back to life just to strangle them all over again. “I don’t know what to do, Lance. I’m all out of chances with her. I don’t think she should hold something I said five years ago against me, but it’s pretty damning. I get that.”

“To be fair, you still felt that way when you met her,” he said. “You and I both know you did, right? All flash and no substance. You hated reality stars. You had no respect for them. Apart from Serenity, do you even have any respect for them now?”

I blew out a hard breath. “I don’t know, man. I haven’t sat down and reassessed every view I’ve ever held now that I’m into Serenity. People change, okay? Shouldn’t we commend people when they open their minds and realize they were wrong?”

“Calm down, Dash,” he said slowly. I heard the padding of his footsteps as he walked back to my door. Then I heard it click shut but he obviously hadn’t left. “Just think this through, man. How would you have felt if she’d said something like that about your family? Like if she said every St. Clair brother was a huge man-whore. Even if she said it a long time ago, it does make a person question the beliefs someone else holds now.”

I finally spun to face him, my eyes narrowing, and I gripped the back of my chair so hard that my fingers started aching. “Sure, but does that mean I’d have shut her out if she had said something like that? No, because that’s not what you do when you’re in a relationship. Aren’t you supposed to hear the other person out before you leap to conclusions? Aren’t people supposed to communicate?”

“Yes, you are, but you guys are still new and you can’t blame her for needing a minute.”

“I don’t.” I shoved my hands into my hair and pulled at the longer bits on top. “I don’t fucking blame her. I blame her ex, if you must know, but even then, this was five years ago. She won’t even talk to me about something I said five years ago?”

“It’s not about what you said five years ago, Dash,” he said calmly. “It’s about the beliefs you held until a couple months ago. If you want her to talk to you, you have to make her see that you’re not that person anymore.”

I snorted. “How am I supposed to do that? I can’t crack open my head and let her have a poke around my thoughts.”

“No, you can’t, but again, things are still new for you even if you are in love. You need to⁠—”

I balked at what he’d said. “We’re not in love. We’re giddy, sure. Horny, definitely. We like each other a lot, but⁠—”

“You don’t have to admit it, but everyone else can see it, bud. You’re in love. I happen to know that you know it too, by the way. I’ve practically seen you thinking it. You just haven’t said the words yet. Maybe you should.”

“I’m not telling her I love her as a way to get her to forgive me,” I said firmly. “Whether it’s true or not, I’ve never said that to a woman before. It’s just wrong to say it now and expect it to fix everything else. Besides, love isn’t enough. It’s a good start, but there are a lot of other things that go into making a relationship successful.”

“What, are you an expert on relationships now?”

“No, but my mom is and I’ve been listening to her and Richard a lot lately. You should try it sometime. They’re good at the whole advice-giving thing, even if they think they’re being subtle when they’re really not.”