Page 62 of Some Kinda Romance

“Of course, I’ll be back in a few, then,” I said, puzzled but not too concerned about why she wanted me to come back. I was sure it was wedding related.

Richard said goodbye to her as if he’d never see her again, and she squealed with laughter as she tried to break free of his grasp. “You should go, darling. Or else I might keep you here and you won’t make it to the dinner at all.”

I groaned. “I’ll just wait in the car.”

Thankfully, Richard joined me not a minute later, suddenly quiet until we’d left my parents’ property. He turned to me slowly then, a contemplative gleam in his eyes. “I wish I’d had the opportunity to meet your father for myself. From what I’ve heard, he was a wonderful man.”

“He was.” I cleared my throat, a little uncomfortable but willing to hear him out. He was tipsy, but not belligerent, and he was clearly going somewhere with this since he was still looking right at me. “He would’ve liked you.”

Richard let out a soft chuckle. “Thanks for that. I’m not so sure, but what I’m trying to say is that I wish that you, your brothers, and your sweet mother didn’t have to lose him. I know how much he meant to you and how empty your hearts have been without him. I lost my own father when I was around your age, and to this day, I miss the heck out of the man.”

I blinked hard, not sure what to say to this kind of vulnerability. “I’d like to hear more about your father sometime.”

He nodded. “Perhaps one holiday, I’ll overindulge again and regale you all with tales I’m sure will bore you to tears, but for now, I want you to know that I’ll never try to replace your dad. I’m grateful to him that he created your beautiful family and I just hope he thinks I’m worthy.”

My mouth dried up. I had no idea what to say, but I felt weirdly emotional as I nodded at him. “Thanks for taking me out today, Richard. I had a really good time and I appreciated the opportunity to get to know you a little bit better.”

“You’re welcome, Dash. Thanks for giving me a chance.”

I pulled onto his property, an equally sprawling piece of land as my mother’s and not too far away. Vaguely wondering what he was going to do with it after the wedding, or if he and my mom would move here, I parked outside his front doors and waited until he’d gone inside before I took off.

Back at Mom’s house, she was still more than a little amused that Richard had to go sleep off the game. As I walked through the door, she chuckled and waved for me to join her for another cup of coffee.

“Thanks for getting him home, honey. Ballgames sure seem to get to the men in my life, don’t they? I remember so many times when your daddy got back needing a good nap. It always tickles me that sports can get to them so much. Are you sure you had fun?”

“I really did,” I assured her. “He reminded me a little bit of Dad today, too. I’m glad you can see things like that in him without getting sad.”

She shrugged one shoulder. “I’m always going to be a little bit sad, but there’s nothing for it. Life goes on and we can choose to either live it or to let the grief kill us in turn. I, for one, am not done with this life just yet.”

“Good,” I said, pulling her in for a side hug. “I’m glad. I’m not done with it yet either.”

As she waited for the coffee, she turned to look up at me and patted my chest before she stepped out from under my arm. “Speaking of which, I wanted to talk to you about the wedding.”

“I figured,” I said. “What’s up?”

“Well, I’ve been thinking about who’s going to give me away at the wedding. I could walk in by myself, of course, but I’d prefer not to.”

“Right,” I said. “Of course.”

“I was thinking Zachary might be best,” she said hesitantly. “What do you think? Do you think he’d say yes if I asked?”

“I’m sure he will, but why not me?” I knew it was juvenile, but I couldn’t help but be hurt that I wasn’t in the running. “I’ve only been helping you plan the entire thing. I see you all the time, but you want to ask Zach instead?”

Mom frowned, her eyes soft and gentle on mine. “I didn’t think you’d want to, darling. Today was the first time you spent any time alone with Richard and…”

She trailed off and I frowned right back at her. “Why wouldn’t I want to? I’ve been there for you every step of the way with all this. Of course, I want to see it through to the end.”

Staring at me for another beat, a slow smile finally started spreading on her lips. “I’d love it if you would do it, honey. I didn’t mean to hurt you. I just didn’t want to expect any more of you than I already have.”

“I’d be honored,” I said genuinely, though I didn’t like that she thought I wouldn’t want to. “You don’t have to pick me, though. Choose whoever you want.”

Had I really been so terrible to her that she hadn’t wanted to ask me? Even though I was the only one of my brothers helping with the wedding? Did she think I was only doing it because I was in the industry or did she know I was doing it for her?

All those thoughts raced through my head as she smiled at me. I returned the smile, but I didn’t really feel it. I’d thought I was closer to her than any of my brothers. I’d taken care of her more than anyone after my father had died and I’d thought she knew I was doing it because I loved her, but as I sipped my coffee, I wondered if I’d been shutting her out too.

Without even realizing it, had I been almost as closed off with her as I had with everyone else? And if all that was true, how did I make it up to her? Also, how the hell was I only realizing it now?