Page 47 of My All American Girl

“I hate you,” she growled between breaths.

“Good,” I replied. It was better she hated me than have a repeat of what happened at the bar. Her dad would strap me to a missile and shoot me at the sun.

She continued her push-ups, her movements slowing as she approached exhaustion. Despite the tension, I admired her tenacity. She pushed herself to the limit every time. Especially when she was angry. If it took her being pissed at me to get through survival training, then I was happy to piss her off. I seemed to be good at it.

When she finally finished, she collapsed onto the ground, breathing heavily. I stood up, offering her a hand, which she ignored.

“You think this is just some harmless drill?” she spat, sitting up and glaring at me. “You think you’re doing Mo a favor by pushing me like this?”

I crossed my arms. “I’m doing what needs to be done. You want to succeed, don’t you?”

She narrowed her eyes. “You know I do.”

“Then stop fighting me and start listening. You have potential, Sarah. But you’re not going to get anywhere with that attitude.”

She huffed, getting to her feet. “I don’t need your lectures.”

I stepped closer, lowering my voice. “You do if you want to survive.”

For a moment, we stood there in silence, the tension thick between us. Then she turned away, grabbing her water bottle and taking a long drink.

I watched her and wondered what the hell I was doing. This was getting more complicated by the day. Sarah was more than just a trainee to me, and that was dangerous. I needed to keep my distance, to keep things professional, but it was getting harder and harder.

“You think I’m not taking this seriously?” she asked suddenly, her back still turned to me.

I sighed. “I think you’re letting your emotions get in the way. And that’s going to be your downfall if you don’t get a grip. You can’t be emotional in a cockpit.”

She turned back to me, her expression hard. “I’m not the one with the problem, Dean. Maybe you need to look in the mirror.”

Her words stung, but I didn’t let it show. “Enough. We’re done for today.”

She stared at me for a moment longer before nodding and walking away. I watched her go, knowing I needed to focus on being her mentor and helping her succeed, not dwell on the confusing feelings that kept bubbling up whenever we were together.

She glanced over her shoulder and shot me a dirty look. I stared right back at her. I needed her to hate me. That was the only way this worked. She couldn’t afford to be distracted. If she was thinking about me, she was going to suffer.

It was only a matter of time before something had to give. For now, all I could do was keep pushing her, keep challenging her, and hope that she would come out the other side stronger and more prepared for what lay ahead.

I shook my head, trying to clear my thoughts. Survival training was just around the corner, and Sarah needed all the help she could get.

A thought snuck in. I had to quickly kick it from my head. If I could get her through the survival stuff, then the hardest part of her training was over. Maybe then we could hook up.

I walked back to my house, my mind whirring with worry and uncertainty. The next few weeks were pivotal. They would decide not just Sarah’s fate in the program, but my own future. If she washed out, then Mo would let me off the hook. I could go to London. It was tempting, but I couldn’t do that to Sarah. She was working too hard. I refused to sabotage her or wish for her failure.