Page 95 of Spring Break Fling

I took a deep breath and clicked it open, trying to shift my focus from Nikko to work. But my mind kept drifting back to him, to the way things ended, to Jessie’s accusatory words.

The email was brief. “Hannah, need your preliminary report on the project by end of day. Details matter. This could be a make-or-break opportunity for the company.”

Make or break. The words echoed in my mind, suddenly feeling loaded with more meaning than just a business opportunity. Wasn’t that exactly what happened with Nikko? A potential connection, destroyed by my own calculated actions?

I quickly replied and told him I was boarding my flight and would send over something after I landed. Did the man think I was a machine?

Yes, that was exactly what he thought because, up until a couple of weeks ago, I had been. I had always been the one busting ass and never quitting. I worked the long hours. I sacrificed weekends. In a way, I set myself up for failure. I set the bar too high.

“Idiot.”

“Excuse me?”

I looked up and saw a man in a business suit sitting a few chairs down. He was looking at me like I was the worst person in the world.

“Not you. I was talking to myself.”

He scowled at me and said nothing more. Idiot.

Thankfully, we boarded a few minutes later. After takeoff, I opened my laptop and did my best to work. Crying through an entire flight was a real power move—one I didn’t recommend. By the time I landed in Boise, I looked like a soggy tissue someone had tried to wring out and reuse. My nose was red, my eyes were puffy, and I was pretty sure the guy in the aisle seat had whispered something about me being on a soap opera.

My head hurt from all the crying and the flying. I just wanted to crawl into my bed and pretend life wasn’t happening around me. My laptop bag felt like it weighed a thousand pounds. My purse another thousand. I dragged my ass through the terminal.

When I saw Tara waiting at baggage claim, her face a mix of sympathy and mild alarm, I crumpled into her arms.

“Oh, babe,” she said, squeezing me tightly. “You look like someone ran over your dog, backed up, and did it again for good measure.”

“Feel worse.” I sniffled.

“Just hold on,” she said. “We’ll get your suitcase and get you out of here.”

Tara guided me to her car, patting my back like I was a toddler who’d just scraped her knee. “We’ll fix this,” she said firmly, shoving my suitcase into the trunk. “And if we can’t, I’ll at least get you some ice cream. Or tequila. And of course, chocolate.”

The drive to my apartment was quiet at first, me staring out the window and Tara periodically glancing over like she was worried I might spontaneously combust. She would occasionally touch my arm or offer me a tissue from her bag.

“I screwed everything up,” I muttered finally, breaking the silence.

Tara raised an eyebrow but said nothing, letting me continue.

“It all fell apart in the final hour. Nikko—” His name was like a knife to the chest, but I pressed on. “He looked so hurt, Tara. The betrayal in his eyes… I can’t stand that I did that to him. I shouldn’t have gone through with the plan. It was petty, it was cruel, and⁠—”

“My idea,” Tara interrupted softly.

I blinked at her.

She kept her eyes on the road, her grip on the steering wheel tightening. “I’m sorry, Hannah. I just hated him so much after what he did to you with the tattoo. It sounded like a good plan at the time. A victimless crime really. You’d get some revenge and come home. He’d have some hurt feelings, but he would get over it. That was my intention. I’m so sorry.”

I let out a long, shaky breath. “Don’t blame yourself. I’m a grown woman. I made my own choices, and they were terrible ones. I should’ve told him the truth as soon as I realized I had feelings for him. Now I’ve left him behind knowing he’s drowning—no job, beat to hell, and betrayed by me. It’s all a mess.”

“And so is your hair,” Tara said, trying to lighten the mood. “Seriously, when’s the last time you brushed it?”

I gave her a weak laugh. “Thanks for that. Really hitting me where it hurts.”

“You’re beautiful on the inside.”

I snorted. “Great. I think I really fucked up. My job is in limbo. Clarke is so disappointed in me. I screwed up my big chance. Only I could manage to lose a man and a job in the same week. I’m a mess. I’m spiraling.”

“That’s what I’m here for,” she said, her smile fading as she glanced over at me. “Listen, you can’t give everything a hundred and ten percent all the time. Eventually, something has to give. You’ve been pouring your entire soul into this job for years. It’s okay to let yourself slip a little.”