Page 69 of Falling for a Grumpy Hero

“Gladly.” He grinned against my mouth and thrust into me, his hands still in mine as he kissed me again.

Almost instantly, I started unraveling, moving with him at a furious pace that made me see stars and feel like I could touch the moon. Ford found a rhythm and stuck to it, his pelvis brushing against my clit on every thrust. He moaned into our kisses, the throaty sounds only sending me higher and higher.

When I felt his thighs quiver and his stomach dip against mine, I knew he was close too and I let go, screaming his name as I clamped down on him. The orgasm that barreled into me made the wait worthwhile, starting deep inside and working its way out to my extremities. I swore I even felt it in my gums, my fingernails digging into his back as he thrust deep inside me before he swelled, his hips finally staggering as he found his release.

As he collapsed on top of me, both of us sweaty and panting, I folded my arms around his neck and toyed with the ends of his hair. My bones felt like jello, my insides still quaking and my very world feeling like it’d been tipped on its head after that.

Somehow, it’d been so incredibly tender and intimate, but also desperate and hungry, hard and fast. My eyelids fluttered closed as I wondered where this man had been all my life and why everything was so much better with him.

“I love you,” I breathed against his hair without even thinking about it. My brain was complete mush and all I knew right now was that I wanted to spend every day and every night with him for the rest of my life. “I do, Ford Callahan. I love you.”

He tensed above me, and in that moment, I suddenly realized what I’d just said—and that it’d been a complete slip. I hadn’t meant to tell him that yet. I knew it was too soon and I’d been trying to let him set the pace, but it was too late.

The next thing I knew, he was in a complete tailspin, rolling off me and swinging his legs off the mattress. In the dark, I could see the silhouette of his broad shoulders and they were completely tense as he stood up, mumbling something I couldn’t make out under his breath.

My heart started slamming against my ribs. “Ford, I⁠—”

“Yep,” he ground out as he retreated into the bathroom, walking so fast that he quickly melted into the shadows.

I groaned and flopped my arm over my eyes, embarrassment bleeding into every corner of my being. I felt awful and I hadn’t even really caught my breath yet, but I doubted that would make any difference to him.

“Shit,” I mumbled quietly. “Shit. Shit. Shit.”

I’d pushed too hard, too fast, and now, he’d literally run away from me without even taking the damn condom off. My mind spun out as humiliation settled into my bones. Whatever he’d muttered before he’d walked away, it hadn’t been that he loved me too—and that?

That was really the only thing I needed to know right now.

36

FORD

On Sunday morning after the block party, I stood in my kitchen, pacing at five a.m. I’d barely slept and I’d finally given up a few minutes ago, deciding that the best thing I could do was to get out of the room before my restlessness woke Lila up at the crack of dawn.

Rook had been abandoning the duties he’d been trained for lately whenever she was around, but he was right by my side now, letting me know that I was even more severely on edge than I’d realized. I felt off today, though.

Very off.

After we’d gotten back to my place last night, I’d thrown myself into Lila, and for a while, it’d worked. I’d drowned the memories in the sounds of her moans and I’d shut out the darkness by worshiping her body.

Then I’d cum so hard that I hadn’t been thinking at all—until she’d told me that she loved me. I had no idea where that had come from and I was pretty sure it’d been a heat of the moment thing, but it’d hit me harder than I’d ever have thought possible.

Because I wasn’t lovable. Never had been.

Luke, however, had been lovable. He’d had a girl who had loved him since before they’d really even known what love was. But he wasn’t here to be loved. He didn’t have the future they’d planned for.

Yet here I was, the punk whose only plan had been to become a marine, and out of nowhere, the most beautiful woman in the world was telling me that she loved me after she’d let me ravage her. It’d felt like a fluke. A mistake made by the universe itself in which I had stepped into the life he was supposed to have had.

And ever since, I hadn’t been able to stop thinking about the accident. About the moment I’d looked over, and the helicopter was going down, and Luke had been shot, and the universe had made a monumental fucking error in judgment.

Every time I blinked, I saw those green eyes piercing mine and it was like I could feel the phantom grip of his fingers on my arm. It was haunting me to the point where I could barely speak or think as I sat down at the kitchen table, my coffee in front of me, but the fact that I’d gotten it from the machine to my chair without spilling it all over was a miracle.

I wasn’t sure how long I’d been sitting there when Lila appeared in the doorway. All I knew was that it was suddenly very light in the room, which meant it’d been at least an hour. Probably more.

She was fully dressed in another bright, floral-patterned shirt with a sunshine yellow skirt that brushed against her ankles when she walked. Her hair was up in a high ponytail, her face completely bare of any makeup.

“I’m going home,” she said quietly. “Are you alright?”

I couldn’t force myself to speak, so I just nodded, but I couldn’t look away from her either. Rook pressed his head against my thigh instead of going to her, which was yet another sign that I was in deep, deep trouble.