Page 87 of Falling for a Grumpy Hero

“After that though,” I said, my voice a little less hoarse, “once I was on my feet and life was supposed to be carrying on, it just didn’t get any better. I threw myself into college, got a degree in engineering, eventually started my own firm, and I’ve been doing really well, but that trauma? The structure and routine of engineering brought me some sense of normality during the day, but it couldn’t save me at night.”

More chuckles rang out and I nodded, looking around and making eye contact. Some of the guys had had things plenty rough themselves. “I sought out things that made sense, you know? Things that couldn’t fail. Things I wouldn’t lose. But doing that only got me stuck in the dark for a long, long time.”

I smiled faintly as I thought of the first time I’d seen Lila, thinking she was crazy despite how instantly attracted I’d been to her. If only I’d known then how my life was about to change.

“I’m actually still stuck in the dark some days. My most recent episode was only a few weeks ago, so I’m in no position to tell anyone that it will get better. It’s taken me a fucking decade to find a reason to keep going, but I’ve also realized that having something to lose is just living. I’d like to think I’m a better man for it.”

No one said anything once I’d finished, but then several guys started clapping me on the back and others just gave me some more nods. I felt like a mountain range had been lifted from my shoulders. When Dan approached me after the meeting, I grinned at him.

“Thank you,” I said, meaning it more than I’d ever meant anything before. “That was good. I’m not sure I ever would’ve gotten here without your encouragement, so thank you for not giving up on me.”

He clasped my hand warmly when I offered it to him. Then he pulled me in for a hug. “We don’t give up on anyone, son. Not if we can help it.”

I thumped him on the back and let go, my attention caught by one of the new guys who was skulking out of the room, head down and hands shoved deep into his pockets. Dan glanced at him, sighing before he turned back to me.

“Would you consider becoming a mentor?” he asked. “Trevor, that guy you were just looking at, he’s in the process of getting a support dog and he could use some help. I told him you might be able to guide him through the process.”

Much to my own surprise, I nodded. “Sure. Rook’s great. I haven’t always appreciated him as much as I should, but he’s really helped me. If I can get someone else on the path to having an animal who does that for them, of course, I’ll help.”

Dan grinned and shook my hand again. “Excellent. I’ll let him know.”

We said our goodbyes and I went off to find Lila, but it seemed like their support group meeting wasn’t over yet. The door was open though, and I heard the sweet, lyrical sound of her voice drifting into the hallway.

“I still feel so guilty for putting my parents through my disease. I know it wasn’t my fault that I got it, but it changed things for me.” She sighed. “Sometimes, I look at Ford and it’s like looking in a mirror, showing me parts of myself I bury so deep, but he chooses to live in it. We balance each other out that way.”

I smiled to myself. Yep, that’s the woman I’m going to marry right there, folks.

There was no rush, though. I leaned against the wall, suddenly knowing that this was the day I would always remember as the day I realized we would have our whole lives together. Lila and I were two sides of the same coin, and just like Melissa had felt like she’d always been meant to find her husband after everything they’d both gone through, I believed we’d always been meant to find each other too.

47

LILA

Two weeks after my meeting with the professor, the semester ended. I’d passed all my classes with flying colors and Ford had officially pitched the idea of adding “interior design” to the list of services offered on the CE website.

Jared and everyone else at the firm were staunch supporters of the idea, but I’d told them I would think about it. As well as the semester had gone, I knew I still had a lot left to learn in my final semester.

Eager as I was to get started and to launch my career, I was torn between being the best I could be when I officially opened for business and just jumping in and getting on with it. Either way, my future seemed brighter than ever with possibility—and not just on the career front.

It was late in the summer and still hot as hell as I tossed a ball to Rook in Ford’s backyard. He caught it midair and I laughed. My were cheeks glowing with heat after spending so much time with him out here, but I was having too much fun with him to take a break.

He panted as he jogged back to me, dropping the ball I’d gotten him on our first day together at my feet. I ran my fingers through his fur and bent over to pick it up. “Are you sure you’re not tired yet, boy?”

As if to answer my question, he leaped into the air and barked, then shot to the other side of the yard as soon as his feet touched the ground. I pulled my arm back and let the ball fly, watching it arc into the sky before crashing back down.

A happy sigh escaped me as I watched him race after the ball when it bounced. Ford and I had been settling into life together these last few weeks, and honestly, it had been amazing so far. Not only did I love waking up with him almost every morning and eating breakfast together before we headed in to work, but I adored learning from him while we were there, helping with his projects, and then getting to come home with him every night.

Every expectation I’d had of what it might be like between us as a couple had been exceeded again and again. It blew my mind that anyone could be this happy, and while there was a part of my brain that kept warning me about the other shoe dropping at any moment, I did what I’d always done with that part of my brain—shut it down and ignored it completely.

Contrary to what most people seemed to think, my eternal optimism and cheerful demeanor weren’t because I was ignorant or because I didn’t know that bad things happened. It was the complete opposite of that.

I knew exactly how fast everything could change and I chose to be happy while I could. Since I’d never been happier than I was right then, that meant I was embracing every ounce of joy with everything I had. Even the simple pleasures like standing under the blistering hot sun, tossing a ball to a dog I loved almost as much as his owner.

I spent most of my time at Ford’s house these days, to the point where I was seriously wondering if I should even bother renewing the lease on my apartment in a few months. Rook kept me company whenever Ford wasn’t there. It was like we had our own little family going and I couldn’t get enough of it.

As Rook brought the ball back to me, his ears suddenly pricked and he dropped the ball, darting toward the house. I frowned, wondering why it seemed like he was going to investigate something. Then I heard familiar voices cutting through the air.

No. Is that? It can’t be. Can it? No. How?