Page 45 of Hate To Be Mine

And it was making me hard.

“So,” I said, trying to distract myself. “Is it difficult? Working for your father?”

She sighed. “Yes. It adds a lot of pressure. Just like you were saying about working in your family’s company. Everything I do reflects on him and the company and he does not let me forget it. Being out here is already overwhelming. Sending me into the field isn’t normal procedure. I usually work from the office, reviewing documentation and writing policies.” She paused and looked into the dark night. “I’m not good at the people part.”

“You did pretty great today with the Safety Bingo.”

“That’s different. I’ve never been this far from home without family. Never been on-site as the ‘bad cop’ like this. I don’t know how to be firm about safety without making everyone hate me.”

The vulnerability in her admission hit me right in the chest. I felt like such a dick for being cold to her at first. I had let myself forget she was a human with real feelings.

“For what it’s worth,” I said, “I don’t think anyone hates you anymore. You won them over today. And I’m sorry for my role in that.”

“Some of them, maybe. Others are still waiting for me to screw up so they can say I told you so. Or run to you and remind you why you hate me.”

“I don’t hate you.”

“Could have fooled me.”

“I have a lot of pressure on me and I took out my frustration on you.”

“I get it,” she said with a sigh.

“This is my first time being fully in charge,” I said. She knew it already, but I felt like I really needed her to understand I wasn’t the asshole. Maybe I was, but I didn’t want her to think I was only an asshole. “Usually I just show up to shoots, look pretty, do what the photographers tell me, go home. I’ve never had to run an entire production before. Never had to make all the decisions and deal with all the personalities and keep everything on track. I know what has to be done and I’ve done a lot of directing, but to be the guy that’s in charge, the one responsible? That’s new. That’s a lot. Usually, if something goes wrong, I just point at the other guy. Now, I’m that guy.”

“But you’re doing well.”

“Am I? Because it feels like I’m barely keeping my head above water. My brothers all think I’m going to screw this up. They’re just waiting for me to prove them right.”

“Why do they think that?”

I laughed, but it came out bitter. “Like I said, I’m the pretty one. The airhead model. Adrian went to business school, runs the company. Briggs went to law school, handles all our legal stuff. Even Dash, who’s the black sheep, at least has logistics expertise. Me? I chose modeling because I liked the attention and the travel and not having to think too hard about anything.”

“That’s not fair.”

“Maybe not. But it’s what they see.” I ran a hand through my damp hair. I felt like a big crybaby. No one cried for the prince.

“So this shoot is your chance to prove you’re more than that,” she said, understanding in her voice.

“Exactly. This is my shot to show everyone I can handle a big project. I’m not just a pretty face with decent abs and a questionable relationship history.”

“Hey, for what it’s worth, you’ve impressed me.”

I turned to look at her, even though I could barely see her face in the darkness. “Yeah?”

“Yeah. You listen. You adapt. You care about getting it right. That’s more than a lot of people in your position would do. I know we’ve had our differences, but I think you’re trying.”

That meant more than it should, coming from a total stranger. It meant a lot because I knew how high her standards were. If she was telling me I was doing something right, I knew she meant it.

I couldn’t remember when any woman had ever made me feel truly seen. Not just the body.

Me.

I felt something I had never really felt before. Lust and desire, sure. But it was more of a need. Like my body and brain would not be satisfied with just anybody—it had to be her.

Fuck it.

I leaned in and kissed her.