Page 67 of Never To Be Mine

If I didn’t go, I’d look unprofessional. Like I couldn’t handle working with him after what happened. My father would wonder why I wasn’t keeping close tabs on such an important partnership.

But if I did go, I would have to face him. Look him in the eye. Pretend my body wasn’t still humming from the memory of his hands on my skin.

I opened my laptop again, fingers hovering over the keyboard. I should respond. Tell him yes or no. Give him something to work with. Instead, I closed it again. I didn’t want to commit either way.

“You’re being ridiculous,” I muttered.

Kari popped her head in my office. “You’re the one talking to yourself. Everything okay?”

“No.”

She laughed and stepped inside, closing the door behind her. “Anything I can do to help?”

Kari didn’t know about the tour Hollis had given me at his office. Obviously. That was not something I wanted to share. I prided myself on being a professional. I’d worked with attractive men before and never crossed a line. I had never even wanted to cross a line.

To be fair, Hollis wasn’t just attractive. He came from a family of famously hot people, and the family resemblance was strong. If he wanted to, Hollis could have modeled like Sebastian or been a movie star like his mother.

“Hollis Blackwell is going to a sound stage to film an actual commercial tomorrow,” I said, chewing my lower lip. “I’m not sure if I should go or not.”

“Your schedule isn’t too packed tomorrow,” Kari said. “I can clear it.”

“It’s not that.”

“Okay. Then why don’t you want to go? Is it going to be boring or something?”

“No, not boring.”

Her brow furrowed. “You’re going to have to fill me in. I’m lost here.”

I sighed. “I don’t want to be around Hollis.”

“Sure, he gets you all flustered,” she said with a laugh.

“But I should go to the shoot.”

“Then go.”

I look up at the ceiling. “It’s weird.”

“Please don’t tell me this is going to be another wine night.”

I had been considering it but I didn’t tell her that. “No. I’m fine. I’m gonna go home.”

“Want me to clear your schedule for tomorrow morning?”

I had no idea what I was going to do.

“I’ll let you know,” I said.

I packed my stuff and left the office. Because I needed to be prepared for a long ass night, I stopped at the liquor store and bought two bottles of wine.

I didn’t immediately pop them open when I got to my apartment. Water first. I poured myself a glass and stood at my window, looking out at the city lights. This wasn’t like me. I didn’t get twisted up over men. I didn’t let personal feelings interfere with professional decisions.

But nothing about Hollis Blackwell had been like anything else in my life.

I thought about the men I’d dated over the years. Nice guys, mostly. Boring, if I was honest. The kind of dates where I’d check my phone halfway through dinner, already thinking about the pitch I needed to prepare for the next day. None of them had ever made me feel like I was standing on the edge of something dangerous and exhilarating.

None of them had ever made me risk it all.