Page 228 of The Discount Damsel

“And as a grand master,” Bradley said, stepping in before his new and offended peers could take action, “I have the authority to do what I wish.”

“If you take this appointment, you’ll be branded a rogue,” Vesuvius shouted.

“I was not given this gift to be micromanaged,” Bradley thundered. The windows rattled in their frames, and all the sorcerers and astral projections flinched, except Excelsior. “I know our code of ethics—to use my magic for the betterment of this world. And I can assure you, serving in this noble woman’s court will achieve that and more.”

“But—”

“Oh shut up, Udora,” Excelsior cut in. “Stop needling him and turn your focus on what really matters. For instance, the dark mage Donmarin captured in a containment field in the Ashburnum desert. We need to send a collection team. And while you all are deciding who that should be, I’m going to see these lovely young people out.”

Excelsior herded Bradley towards the door, Millie and Dirk quickly following from the seating gallery. They traveled down a winding staircase eerily similar to the one in the tower, though this one was carved from wood and guarded by a banister. At the exit, all four of them inhaled the sweet air of freedom. It tasted of freshly mown grass and last night’s rain. Dirk led the way to the lakeside path, disappearing momentarily behind the lilac shrubs.

“It would be best if you three didn’t linger.” Walking briskly, Excelsior chanced a look over his shoulder, but they weren’t being pursued. Yet. “I suggest you return to the tower at once to collect the rest of your court and anything else you might need. Don’t worry about your things here, Donmarin, I’ll send them along as soon as you have a forwarding address. But before you go sailing about the world, dear boy, would you be so kind as to fly Festus back to the College? I left him rather adrift on that balcony.”

“Of course, Master.”

“Much appreciated. He’ll obey your command as a grand master, but he can be a mite nippy, so have a care. And, if you don’t mind, would you return the hag stone? I’ll cast the portal for you, but then I’d like to use it myself. Miss Penelope is expecting a very long and very relaxing holiday at Lagunas after all that turmoil she experienced overseeing your time in the tower, and I find myself suddenly in the mood for one of their famous tangelo margaritas.”

Bradley returned the malachite-flecked hag stone, and Excelsior summoned the portal beside the lake. He scratched the feathers under Dirk’s chin, kissed Millie lightly on the cheek, and cupped Bradley’s face like an affectionate grandfather.

“I expect you to stay in touch, Donmarin. Your training is not yet complete. You have the makings of a fantastic archmaster.”

Bradley’s heart swelled. “Thank you, Master.”

As the three approached the portal, something coppery shimmered in the air between them. An astral projection manifesting.

“Hurry,” Excelsior urged. “Before one of our infernal colleagues try to rope us into whatever nonsense this is about.”

They rushed forward, clearing the patch of lawn just before the copper sparkles took shape. Dirk zipped through the portal first, Bradley following and leading Millie by the hand.

“Salutations, Master Excelsior,” the projection greeted in a familiar voice. “Please accept this cordial invitation to the wedding of Princess Rosamund Evangeline Tisane of Amberly, scheduled for six twenty-three this very evening, to Prince Chandler Stonevein of Leighton.”

Millie whipped around, but her momentum was already carrying her through the portal. “Master Olabeus?”

“I couldn’t possibly,” Excelsior told the projection, whose shoulders drooped in disappointment. “I’m holidaying in Lagunas posthaste. But I’ll send along a postcard and a tangelo tree for the Tisanes’ greenhouse, how’s that?”

The shimmering veil swallowed her, and she stumbled into the workroom. The pirate princess wrenched free of the sorcerer and spun right around to launch herself back through the portal. It winked out of existence before she could even complete her spin, which she concluded was out of spite instead of any law of magic.

“Did you hear that?” she demanded of the others.

“Leighton?” Dirk exclaimed softly. “The prince who tried to rip my heart out is marrying your sister?”

CHAPTER 92

WHEN IN DOUBT OR THINKING UP SOLUTIONS TO DASTARDLY PLOTS, DRINK SOME TEA

Millie’s hand jumped for the hilt of her cutlass, but it wasn’t there. Chandler attempting to schmooze her into an engagement was one thing, since Millie was wise enough to see through his charms, but him beguiling her dear sweet idiot of a younger sister with false promises of love and dreams come true was something altogether diabolical.

“I did hear the army captain say Leighton already had another princess on the hook.” Bradley ran a hand through his hair. “I’m sorry, Millie. I had no idea he was talking about your sister.”

“Can you astral project? Warn Olabeus?”

He gnawed on his lower lip in thought. “I’ve never tried. I know the spell, but it’s not as simple as uttering a few words in High Aetherial. There’s meditation, and I think you need incense⁠—”

She whirled away from him, heading for the stairwell.

“I can try, Millie!”

“I need tea,” she shouted, and raced down to the kitchen.