Page 50 of Rumor Has It

“Some women will never understand quantity over quality.” He flexes his muscle.

I nod. “Agreed. Some will also never have standards, but that ain’t me.”

“You slay me.” He lays his hand over his heart, falling to the ground with Boo on top of him.

Ridge is the male version of Maisyn. He’s my right hand and best friend, well, who’s a male. Ridge came to college with me after the first semester. I needed the help, and he wanted the title.

We never would’ve made it without him. Dad visited as much as he could, but with Grandpa trying to run everything by himself, he split his time between us. Maisyn was pregnant by that time, then her boyfriend was killed. Have I mentioned that we’ve had our hands full over the last ten years?

I press the back of my wrist to my forehead, playing along. “Oh me, oh my! What will I ever do? My Boo Baby and Sugar Daddy have gone and left me here alone. What shall I ever do?” I say in my best, ‘damsel in distress—Southern twang version’.

“Never fear,” Ridge sits straight up, holding his Boo Baby to his side. “Sugah Daddy is here!”

“You people have issues.” One of the movers snickers as he walks by us, acting out our scene.

Ridge gets to his feet, jutting his chest out as he uses my arm as a barrier. “You better be glad my baby momma be holdin’ me back!”

“I’m not your baby.” Ridge’s head spins as fast as mine as we stand gaping at her.

“What makes you think that?” I dig my nails into Ridge’s arm, anticipating her answer. Ten years I’ve dodged this topic, and we’re not here twenty-four hours before I’m faced with it.

Boo holds her hand up, counting off her fingers. “First of all, he’s Uncle Ridge. Second of all, you would’ve told me. Third, he doesn’t look like me. Fourth…”

“We get the point; calm down there.” I stop her before she can reveal where the family jewels are hidden.

She places her hand on hip. “I’m just sayin’—he’s not my daddy.”

“And I’m telling you, we’re on the front lawn, and this is not the place to divulge or discuss all manner of topics.” I mimic her stance, while trying not to have a small panic attack.

“Whatever.” Ridge snorts when she rolls her eyes, walking away. “One day soon, you’re gonna have to tell me.”

“Stop laughing at this shit!” I backhand him in his breadbasket.

He gasps. “What did I do?”

“Everything. Nothing.” My shoulders slump. “Why do I have this crappy feeling that this is the worst mistake of my life?”

“I can think of one other time that’s worse than this.” He taps his chin.

I smash my hand in his face. “You’re an asshole.”

“Seriously?” he whines as I put as much distance between us as I can. “That hurt!” he yells, running up behind me.

“I’m breaking up with you!” I glare at him as I rush through the door, locking it behind me. I hurry to the other room, making him sweat.

He beats on the door, until his baby girl comes to it. I peek around the corner as she opens it for him. “Come on in, Uncle Ridge.”

“Thank you, Boo Baby.” He kisses the top of her head. “Your mom is a meany.”

“She’s only doing what she’s thinks is best for me.” She half shrugs.

He catches her arm as she tries to walk away. “What’s up, Boo?”

“Doesn’t matter.” Her frown deepens, and I’m gut checked.

He wraps his arm around her, leading her to the only chair we have in the house. He sits, pulling her into his lap. “Tell me. You know I can keep a secret.”

“I shouldn’t.” She shakes her head. "It might make Momma cry.”

He nods with understanding. “I won’t tell, if you don’t.”

“Why do you call me Boo?” she chews her lip. “Also, why won’t Momma tell me who my daddy is? Everyone knows who their dad is but me, even if they have bad dads.” She crosses her arms, pouting, giving Ridge two seconds to plead with me as I hide out of her line of sight.

I chicken out, shaking my head, I make him tell her something. Anything. Because my words and actions continue to fail me and her. He mulls it over, tucking her close to his chest.

“When your mom found out she was having you, she put a lot of thought into what would be best for everyone involved. She was young, but she still thought of you first. Have patience with her, Boo. She loves you more than her own life, and when the time is right, you’ll know.” This. It’s the reason I love him as much as I do.

She sighs, leaning into him. “Okay, but if I don’t find out soon, I’m going on television and making an announcement.”

“Oh, that’ll make her day!” He chuckles. “Soon, Boo Baby. Soon.”

“Why do you call me Boo Baby?” She peers up at him.

He glances at me, smirking. I narrow my eyes at him, knowing he’s dying to tell her. “The only way I can answer right now is to tell you, you were such a surprise to all of us, it was like yelling … BOO!”

Laughter fills the entire house and my decrepit soul. Ridge has always been here for us, and I don’t know what I’d ever do without him. I hope I never have to find out, although he told me one day, “He’d be here if he could, and I wouldn’t. I’m just a placeholder.”

He’s much more than that; he’s my best friend.