Page 63 of Drive Me Crazy

One frowns, tilting his head as he gets closer. "You're not waiting on Harper?"

"Ahhh, no." I press my mouth into a thin line, rocking back on my heels. "I figured she'd go home tonight with her parents, so I wanted to get out of the way. You know, give them some time together and all."

"I see." He lifts his head, nodding slowly. "This is Agent Adams; he wanted to meet you and get your basics so he can reach out in a day or two."

Agent Adams juts his hand out for me to take it, I do but only because I want to get this over with. "It's good to meet you, I hope you don't mind the intrusion."

"I think we're well past that shit. How can I help you?"

"As you probably know, I'll need to come by and get a statement from you. Would you like to arrange the details now?" He scrolls his phone, ready to enter any information I offer.

"Yeah, sure. I'll be at Mack's Garage in Cherry Grove the rest of the week." I avert my eyes when One narrows his at me.

The agent's head bounces from me to One and back. "I thought you lived near where the incident took place?"

"My home is there but I need to make up some work time, so I'll be at my apartment for the foreseeable future. My business partner is weeks away from giving birth, I need to be closer to work." I shove my hands in pockets and pray One takes my answer at face value.

He nods, making notes. "Alright, I'll swing by tomorrow afternoon."

"By the way, if you run into a smallish girl at the front desk and she gives you any shit, it's best you take it. She's my niece, and little fireball. You'll never get to me without her approval." I chuckle thinking of Rumor.

"I'll keep it in mind." He offers his hand once again. I yank mine free, taking his with a smile. It's fake as hell, but I've had enough of real for today.

One holds his hand up, a sign for me to wait while he finishes with the agent. Once he walks away, One turns his sites on me. "Are you sure you know what you're doing?"

"No, but I'm not sure it matters either." I shrug.

He pursues his lips; I can tell he's weighing his next words. "Ridge, I've known you since you were five. You're headstrong and have always gone your own way, things I can appreciate, but you need to stop your bullshit or you're gonna lose this girl forever."

"In case you haven't noticed, I've never had her." I fold my arms over my chest, hoping to help keep it from imploding. My heart is already obliterated.

His forehead wrinkles. "I think you need to step back, take some time to be honest with yourself and then come find Harper, she deserves to know what in the hell this all is about because it's obvious it isn't her."

"I can't do it," my body curls in on itself with the weight I'm carrying. "I told her I'd tell her everything and at the time I meant it, but I can see the longer I'm around her, she needs so much more than me. She deserves better."

He glares at me. "You're a damn fool but only time will teach you that lesson."

"I can't do it, One. I'd rather she live knowing I loved her rather than to face how I failed her." I scruff my hand over my face. "I left her there! I did this to her!"

"Son, I'm not sure if you honestly believe that but I can assure you of one thing, if she loves you and you love her, you'll work everything out as long as you're together. But if you walk away now, you're taking a chance on her thinking she can never count on you." He clenches his jaw. He must remember something or biting his tongue, wanting to say more.

"Can't you see?" I rub the tightness in my chest, hoping to get some relief. "She can't." The burden I've carried over her for so long, tips the scale and crushes me under it.

I turn, walking away from everything I've ever wanted but never deserved. For years, I've hated Weston for making me choose between my love for her and her safety.

Today, I learned how misguided my hatred has been. Turns out, I'm the one I should've been angry with all these years. If I had stood up for us... for her, our lives would've been different. Not despite Weston, but because of me.

Emerson waits beside her vehicle as I stalk toward my ride home. I know she wants answers, but I'm tired of talking, and I'm sick of being in my head right now.

"Are you okay?" Emerson's brows are pulled tight, she knows I'm not and yet she's waiting for me to say it.

"No." I jerk the SUV door open and crawl in the back without another word to anyone.

The ride home is quick, I ask them to drop me off at the apartment. I can't stand to think of going back to the house, knowing that everything I've built for us is destroyed and by my hand.

Life's funny. I've spent years working on becoming whole for her, hoping if I was given another chance, I’d make everything right between us. But here I am, with an entirely different hole and it's a gaping mess.

Aksel pulls around to the back lot, stopping by the stairs. I push the door open just as cold wind whips through. It cuts me to the bone, sending chills racing over me, reminiscent of the day's events and so many things I have yet to face.