Page 40 of Absolution

I watch the surf roll in and onto the beach, it's so relaxing. "She's doing great, thanks to the vet that helped her."

"Oh, you took her to a vet here?" His face crumples.

"I did, I was hoping to ask you about her, but I ran into her at the store earlier, I don't think she likes me much. Do you know her?"

He takes a swig from his bottle, staring straight ahead. "Depends on whom she is, there are several veterinarians around here."

"Scarlet. Scarlet Morgan." I pause. "I was thrown when I saw her and her daughter."

"You met Emmie?" He's full-blown frowning now.

"What in the hell is that about?"

He raises his brows. "What?"

"That face you're making, is she crazy or something?"

"Or something will work." He scruffs his hand over his face. "She and Emmie have been through a lot; life hasn't been so good to them."

"I feel that, man. Deep."

He shakes his head, turning on me. "Unless you plan on staying around, leave them alone. They've lost so much in life; it wouldn't be fair to either of them."

"With all the shit I have going on in here," I tap my head. "there's no way I can handle a relationship. Especially one with a child."

His head lulls. "You've been totally against dating for a long time, why now?"

"I guess for the same reason I'm here," I say with a shrug. "I keep feeling like something is missing. I'm wondering if it's here."

"Do you remember me telling you about my time in California?" He cranes his neck, looking back toward the house.

"Yeah, it was one of your first stories. I was thrilled you talked about anything other than childhood memories."

He turns, watching his wife laugh. "I knew I belonged here, but I couldn't bring myself to come home. Kenzie wasn't here; I felt lost anytime I visited. But the minute she came back, fate took over, and there was no fighting it."

This sounds like my puzzles. I can't count the times I've tried to complete one, but there's a gnawing in my gut telling me it's not finished. The pieces are there, like my life, but I can't seem to put them together.

"If I'm going to believe in fate and the effect it might have on my life, I'd have to think this was supposed to happen to me. Do you think I deserve this?" I swallow hard, waiting on his response. In all fairness, this is nothing I don't wonder about myself.

"If I thought that, it would mean Crawford and Kathryn deserved it too. Or I had done something to lose you the way that I have. Nothing any of us did warrant what happened, there are no justifications at all. This had nothing to do with you as a person."

"I wish I could believe that, but I can't help to wonder what happened that day. Why was I spared, and the others weren't? It haunts me day and night."

"You sound like Crawford," he shakes his head. "he blames himself for not finding you sooner."

"Seriously, he’s crazy. No one could have found me sooner."

"Being a SEAL, he knew what it would take to find you. He also understood the red tape, and being a senator, it wouldn't look so great for him to go over the heads of other people to find you."

"So, he called Jackson."

He smiles. "Yes, he called Cole Securities to go get you and bring you home."

"Wait... is that why he's not in the senate anymore?"

"And here they told us you have a brain injury." He chuckles when I flip him off.

I cross my arms, watching my parents laugh and talk. They gave up so much for me and still didn't get their son back. They're still fighting a war they never asked to be a part of. I guess I am too, only with myself not another country this time.