Page 19 of His Good Girl

Still riding that high, I right her dress again, and pull back onto the road. The drive goes by too quickly. As we pull into the parking lot of her place, I realize I am nowhere near ready to say goodbye, knowing once that happens this night is really and truly over. She looks at me hesitantly. The invitation to come in written across her face.

“Let me walk you to your door, Lex. Wait there.” I hop out, adjusting my cock in my pants as I round the car to her side, opening the door and grabbing her hand to help her out. I had intended to just walk her to the door, but I end up pressing her to the car and kissing her. When we’re both breathless, I whisper, “Come on.” And lead her to the door.

The whole way there I’m telling myself that I have to end this now. I have to walk away before things go further, before I risk hurting my daughter more than I already have. The internal battle keeps me quiet the entire walk to her door.

Keys in hand, she turns from the door and looks up at me through her lashes. “Want to come in?”

It’s on the tip of my tongue to throw caution to the wind and go inside. I’m not ready for this night to end. Fuck, I’m not sure how I will ever be ready to walk away from her after what we just shared. Looking past her to the door, I seriously consider saying yes.

Then I think about my daughter, the fact that if she were in town she could easily walk in on us, hell, she’d only need to look out the window and would have seen us kissing in the parking lot. It’s a sobering thought. Dropping my chin to my chest, I blow out a breath before responding, “More than anything Lex, but I can’t.”

Her chin tips up in challenge, something I don’t like flashing in her eyes. “Can’t or won't, Finn?”

“I…I just…I need time to think.” It sounds lame even to my ears, a pathetic copout. When her face falls, I know she agrees. She only lets me see the pain for a split second, before she schools her features and meets my eyes.

“Yep, got it. Wouldn’t want you to do something else you might regret. Thanks for a fun night, see you around, Finn.” She turns to the door, dismissing me. I know I should let her walk inside. End this before someone gets hurt, before my daughter gets hurt. But I can’t. The thought of letting her go inside to that empty apartment thinking I don’t want to be with her twists my stomach in knots.

“Lex.” She pauses but keeps her back to me. “Lex, look at me. Please.” When she meets my eyes, hers are glossy. It’s a dagger to my heart. “I do not regret tonight, not one second of it. But this isn’t something we can rush into. It’s messy, and I—” I can’t seem to form a coherent sentence.

Alexis nods but I see the tiny quiver of her chin. It’s like a bucket of ice has been dumped on the inferno that we have been stoking all night. Leaning in, I touch my forehead to hers, craving the connection, feeling empty and cold without it. “Tonight was beyond anything I could’ve dreamed of. Fuck, it beat any fantasy I’ve allowed myself to have of being with you. A part of me still wonders if it’s just another dream, and I’ll wake up to realize it never really happened. Even worse, waking up and knowing it can’t ever happen again.”

I’m not sure who moves first, but our mouths find each other. For once, it isn’t heavy or frenzied. It’s soft and exploring. I thread my fingers into her hair and hold her to me. We pour all the what-could-have-been feelings into this kiss that I never want to end. Because I know once it does, I have to wake up from this dream and put it behind me. For Alexis, for my daughter, and for me.

Alexis is the one to end the kiss, taking a tiny step back. A slight smile on her face, and a playful glint in her eyes. She unlocks the door and steps inside, doing what I wasn’t strong enough to do.

“Good night, Finn.” She slips out of my jacket and hands it back to me. “Don’t forget this.”

I take a step backward, then another. Putting some distance between us so I’m not tempted to reach out and grab her again. “Good night, Alexis.”

She gently closes the door and I stare at it until I hear the lock click into place. Turning away, I shove my hands into my pockets and slowly make my way back to my car. My heart heavy.

As I'm climbing into my car, my phone bings.

Alexis:

I left you a little present in your coat pocket. Thanks for an unforgettable night, Finn.

Frantically, I reach into the pockets and pull out her black lace thong. My eyes dart to the glass doors of her balcony. There she is, her silhouette framed in the doorway watching me. I bring her panties to my nose and inhale deeply. She turns her back to the window and lets her dress slip from her body to pool at her feet as she walks out of view.

“I deserve a fucking medal or something right now,” I grumble to myself as I pull out of the parking lot, telling myself that one night has to be enough.

What a fucking joke.

That thought lasts all of two days before I find myself grabbing my keys as I head to the door.

Me:

Hey beautiful. I need to see you. You free?

Alexis:

Maybe?

Me:

What if I bring ice cream?

She replies with a picture of her lying on her bed with just a sheet covering her breasts and pussy.