Page 119 of Fame & Rhythm

I hate this.

I hate talking about them.

I hate that they matter.

I hate that I still want to know them.

And I hate that something they did, before I could even understand it, still controls me now.

Anger surges through me, sharp and sudden. “I wish I had never been born,” I scream, yanking at my hair, trying to tear the ache out of my chest.

“Annie… stop!” Mum says, grabbing my hands, trying to pull them away.

But it’s too much.

Everything is too much.

I collapse to the floor, sobbing so hard I can’t catch my breath. My heart pounds in my ears, drowning everything else out. Heat floods through me, my body shaking uncontrollably.

I can’t think.

I can’t breathe.

I can’t make it stop.

I just…

I don’t want to feel this anymore.

My world starts to tilt, slipping at the edges, like I’m falling somewhere else.

Somewhere quieter.

Somewhere it doesn’t hurt.

Somewhere there’s only music.

Only sound.

Only peace.

Take me there.

Please.

Anywhere but here.

Somewhere I don’t feel this.

Somewhere I can just… stop.

Chapter Twenty-Three

Annie

Everything is black.

There’s music somewhere, faint and distant, but I don’t know where it’s coming from. A cold cloth presses to my forehead, grounding me just enough to realize what happened.