Page 16 of Grim Tidings

I have no desire to argue with this impossible man. We can go around and around until we’re both blue in the face, but the reality of the situation will never change. I have to be here until I claim the soul I was sent for. He can’t change what is to come, and neither can I.

As much as I want to.

“Death comes for us all,” I whisper.

Gabriel grunts. “Stop with the fortune cookie bullshit.”

I drop my hands to his chest and push, frustration making my magic flare to life. Shadows lick over my palms, and the added burst sends him stumbling back, his eyes flashing in surprise.

“You want an explanation, but I don’t have one.” I follow him to the other side of the alley and push him again. I get another solid hit before he grapples for my wrists, holding them at my sides in a fierce grip.

“I didn’t choose this,” I spit, furious, burning with rage. I am angry at him, yes, but also with myself. After all these years, I know better than to hope. “I didn’t choose any of this. You think I like being the last thing they see when they realize it’s all over?”

I make a wounded sound and yank myself out of his hold. He lets me go.

“You have no idea what it’s like, watching person after person after person die. To bear the weight of their pain and disappointment. I can’t offer them comfort. I can’t offer them anything.” I look away, frustrated with myself and my honesty. But something in my chest has cracked open, and now every tender, broken thing is spilling out.

Each life I’ve collected is a stone upon my heart, weighing it down. I wanted this assignment to be different so badly. But it’s just more of the same, with a sprinkle of humiliation on top.

I can’t believe I thought I could have something for myself.

I can’t believe I thought it might be him.

“It’s just—” I want so badly for him to understand. For this ache that lingers in my bones to be seen and understood. “Haven’t you ever wanted something different for yourself?”

Something in his face fractures, and for a handful of seconds, hope flares brilliant and bright. Then his eyes harden, and my heart drops to my toes.

“No,” he bites out.

I look away, disappointed.

I’m alone, even in this.

“All I’ve ever wanted,” I manage, my voice tight, “is to feel like I’m a part of something. To belong.”

Against the wall, Gabriel has gone still and watchful. His brows pull together, his face a mask of confusion. “What is this?” he asks. He swallows, and the strong line of his throat bobs. His hands flex, like he wants to reach for his sword again. “Another trick?”

“No.” I laugh, and it croaks out of me. I brush my knuckles across my cheek. “None of this has been a trick.”

The fight leaves me in a rush, making my skin feel prickly and hot. My chest is hollowed out, carved up with all the secrets I just let tumble free. All of it, wasted. On a man who thinks the worst of me. Who thinks my most honest thoughts are a trick.

“I’ll be gone as soon as I’m able,” I tell him. “We don’t need to speak again.”

And then I walk away without another word. With his heavy stare at my back and his kisses still burning against my mouth.

Chapter Five

Darcy

New management,” the man behind the desk says. “No rooms available.”

He reaches up and raps his knuckles against the hand-painted wood sign above him. no vacancy is written in neat, white letters. “Sorry, darlin’.”

He doesn’t sound very sorry. In fact, he’s barely made eye contact since I came in through the front door of this sprawling bed-and-breakfast about a block and a half away from the bar. All I can see of his face is the curve of a strong jaw and dark brown hair, curling just behind his ear. His long legs are propped up on the desk in front of him, crossed at the ankle. Mud on the bottom of his boots and a book in his lap.

I readjust my messenger bag and slip my fingers in the front flap, feeling for the folded-up piece of paper. I breathe a sigh of relief when I touch it. I guess not everything has gone to shit. “Do you know if there is anything else nearby?”

“Nope.” He drags out the word and turns another page in his book.