Page 51 of Silk and Sensibility

“It’s not only the danger of travel I’m worried about. It’s who you’re looking for.”

While Ailin raised her eyebrows, Meilin gasped audibly.

Ming­ming responded first. “Captain Bai, are you jealous of Master Wei?”

Ailin pulled Ming­ming back so she couldn’t embarrass them further, but the young girl’s words could not be pulled back as easily.

Captain Bai’s tan face reddened as he glanced between Ming­ming and Meilin, who was also turning red. “I—” His brows knitted together further. “I promise that what I feel . . . is not jealousy. Unfortunately, I can’t say more, but please take me seriously. I don’t want you to get hurt.”

Ailin cocked her head. This kind of warning was out of character for the taciturn Captain Bai, and she wondered how Meilin would respond.

“I’m not going to get hurt,” Meilin said firmly. Then she looked toward Ailin as if seeking help to end a confrontational conversation.

Ailin nodded in acknowledgment. It had been a while since she and Meilin had communicated silently like this, and she tried to couch her interruption as politely as possible, channeling all her authority as an eldest sister.

“Our whole family appreciates your concern, Captain Bai. We will definitely keep your advice in mind. Now, if you’ll excuse us, we still have much packing to complete before—”

“Is there really no way I can convince you two not to leave Suzhou, Miss Duan?” Captain Bai asked.

Ailin answered for them both. “I’m afraid our travel plans have already been set with our uncle and Grand­mother Jiang.”

Captain Bai sighed, then reached for an object from his belt. “Then would you be willing to take this with you, as a precaution?”

He held a sheathed dagger in his outstretched palm. Its lack of ornamentation made it strange for a gift to a lady, but it looked well-made and practical.

“What’s this for?” Ming­ming asked as she hovered over the item like a magpie looking at treasure.

Captain Bai answered solemnly without looking away from Meilin. “I know Master Meng is bringing Tian and his guards to protect your traveling party, but I want Miss Meilin to have this in case of danger.”

Ailin gave Meilin a look signaling for her to reply for herself, since Captain Bai seemed unlikely to leave otherwise.

Meilin pouted at Captain Bai. “I thought you said I’d be better off running than using a weapon.”

Ailin wondered if the captain would be offended by Meilin’s reference to one of their earlier arguments. Meilin’s relationships with both Master Wei and Captain Bai were so turbulent that Ailin didn’t know what to make of either of them.

To Ailin’s surprise, Captain Bai smiled grimly before responding to Meilin. “You might be better off running, but it never hurts to have more tools on hand when dangers are everywhere.”

縱然無顏，依然前往。

I received an invitation today that feels like a summoning. I know it’s shameless for me to seek you after everything that’s happened, but if I’m being summoned, I want to clear my conscience.

—Unsent letter from Fan Enze to Duan Ailin

Chapter 20

Meilin

As soon as Captain Bai left, Meilin strode to the koi pond, determined to discard the dagger. What was he thinking, giving her something so ominous? Before she could drop it in the water, Ailin grabbed her hand.

“If someone else finds it, there could be misunderstandings. You’re better off hiding it close to you, even if you don’t want to keep it.”

Meilin swallowed her frustration at Ailin’s warning. “Could you hold onto it for me, then? I can’t think of anywhere safer.”

Unlike the jade pendant from Master Wei that she wanted to wear close to her heart, the dagger gave her strange feelings that she wanted to keep at a distance. Captain Bai was an intelligent man she respected as a friend, but the moment he crossed the line, she felt uncomfortable. She couldn’t bear how condescending he was. What gave him the right to warn her against Master Wei?

Meilin was determined to follow her heart no matter what. Not only for herself, but also for Ailin. She needed to be brave so Ailin could see that surrender and resignation were not ingredients for happiness.

That night, after finishing the last of the packing on her own, Meilin drafted a message to Enze, placing it in a box with the letter she intended to send to Master Wei. When the letters were securely put away, she hid Enze’s umbrella at the bottom of a travel chest. She would bring all these items out again when the time was right.