Page 63 of Something Old

He stepped back slightly but continued to hold her hips. “Madeline.” Even if her eyes had been closed, she would have heard the smile in his voice.

“I want to be ready for this, for you and me, but I just don’t know if I am fully, or if I ever will be.” Her voice dropped. “So much of who I am was buried with my family. I’m not who I used to be. . . .”

Grant nodded. “I can’t even imagine what it’s like,” he said tentatively, “but for what it’s worth, I really like the you that you are. The Madeline I know.”

“I don’t want to hurt you.”

His eyes burned into her. “So, don’t.”

If only life were that simple. Just decide not to hurt someone and don’t. Choose not to be broken—and don’t be.

His smile was so kind. So understanding. Every part of Madeline wanted to just . . . welcome him in, in every way. She recalled the time she’d suggested that shared misery wasn’t the best thing to build a relationship on and Grant had so seriously, so earnestly responded, “That’s just it. I feel joy when I’m with you, Madeline. I am joyful. And I’m excited about the future again—both things I never expected to feel again.”

Remembering the comment made her smile even as she winced. She had known exactly what he meant. Exactly. She could be happy with Grant, she knew. And that’s why it felt so wrong. Made her so sad.

But, she reminded herself yet again, hadn’t that been part of—the hugest part, even—of this buying trip? So she could combine it with reconciling with her past, a past she would always long to have been different than it was . . . but wasn’t. And when she’d—stupidly, she saw now—thought he might get back together with Holly, hadn’t it clarified her feelings for him, made her realize what she really wanted?

She put her hand up to his cheek, liking it clean-shaven, but fondly remembering the scruffy, silvery whiskers he’d been hiding behind when she first met him.

Grant nodded, seeming to understand all the things she still couldn’t. Then he turned his face toward her palm and kissed it—the same way she had after their first kiss all those months ago.

He stepped back, exhaling. “We’d better get this show on the road. Lots of miles to cover if we’re going to make it back in time for your shift.”

For the moment, the store seemed the least of her priorities. “Why are you so nice to me?”

He laughed. “Come off it. You’re very nice to me, too. You just have more self-control than I do.”

She wasn’t sure about that at all. “I’m serious.”

Grant’s blue eyes held the depths of the sea as they locked on hers, and for a moment, she thought she might drown in all that she saw there. “From our very first conversation, you reminded me of something old and good about human nature—something I’d forgotten the power of.”

“And what’s that exactly?”

Grant’s smile was shy. He shrugged a little. “Love.”

Madeline’s breath hitched, and she felt the pull of a tide she was powerless against. “You’re a sweet man, Grant Graham.”

Grant looked slightly disappointed but mustered a joke. “Don’t tell anyone.”

“Don’t worry. Your secret’s safe with me—and you do a masterful job of hiding it most of the time.”

As Grant chuckled, Madeline put her hands on both sides of his face again. “I don’t know what it means yet, but I love you too.”

To his apparent surprise, almost horror, tears sprang to his eyes. He rubbed at them furiously. “You don’t have to say that.”

Aw, the poor man. They’d both had a pretty rough ride of life so far, hadn’t they? “Of course, I don’t have to, you nut.”

That made him laugh again and seem embarrassed about his first response—but then he reached into his pocket and withdrew a square of folded flannel. “I got you something when you weren’t looking.”

“What is it?” she asked, but he had already unfolded the small package. She could plainly see for herself what it was: an old-fashioned ring with an intricate silver band and three amber stones nestled in an ornate setting. Her heart stuttered. Was he going to ruin everything by wanting way too much too soon?

“What do you mean by it?” She could hardly get the words out.

He shook his head, intuiting her thoughts. “No panic allowed. The color reminded me of your eyes is all, and, well, it has three stones. One for Lyle, one for Lauren, and one for Ronny.”

Madeline blinked rapidly.

“Mostly though, it’s just a beautiful ring with a history for a beautiful—”